Hello all, my name is Mark. I go to a college that accepts all kinds of mamono ever since they appeared a few years ago, though, there were some issues with them raping men, but the school has set up some rules to help fight against it. Also, to prevent interspecies fighting, the college has set up dorms for specific Mamono, like dragons having a separate dorm from harpies etc.
With there being mamono, I found that my popularity among girls overall has increased. I have caught different mamono staring at me with a hunger in their eyes. When they see me looking back at them they turn away with a blush on their face. I haven’t really found any of them especially attractive, though. There is an exception though, there’s this girl in my class. Or should I say manticore in my class that I like. Her name is Christina. She has beautiful straight red hair that glides down a small way past her shoulders. Like a lot of other individuals in her species, she is pretty well endowed with an f cup. Her wings were a slightly darker shade of red, and her tail is very alluring as it sometimes waves back and forth in the air when she is concentrating on something really hard. I only wish that she would even glance at me. I always try to talk to her, but she seems to always be busy, and whenever she isn’t, I can’t build up enough courage to try to talk to her. It seemed that I was a hopelessly in love, but everything changed one night.
After a late night class, I was heading back to my dorm. It was about 9 at night so it was pretty dark out. The lamps that lit the pathway back to my dorm were spread out by about 50 yards and it was about a 10 minute walk from the class to my dorm. I was about four minutes into my walk when I thought that I felt a pair of eyes on me. Turning around, I couldn’t see anything because it was so dark out. I decided on walking a little faster. I don’t work out so I wasn’t really the strongest guy to defend myself in case someone tried to assault me. Even after walking a little faster, I felt the presence still by me.
I stopped under the next street lamp to try to get a little light into my eyes so I could try to see if someone was actually following me. I also took out my phone to use the flashlight on that.
Scanning the area, I didn’t see any evidence that I was being followed and concluded that it was just my imagination, until… “Mark…” said a voice. It felt very close, almost right behind me.
Before I could turn around, I felt something wrap around my waist and pull me out of the light. A large, soft hand covered my mouth as I was about to yell. “Shh, it’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you.” Said the voice. Upon hearing the voice again, I thought it sounded a bit feminine and distinctly familiar, but at the same time, I didn’t really have time to think about it as I was being carried away from the light.
Eventually, we stopped somewhere. I guessed that we were in one of the flat grass fields that littered the campus and where students would hang out in during the day. The hand (or paw, as I realized) uncovered my mouth and I immediately started to speak.
“Who are you? What do you want?” I asked the person.
“I’m someone who has been watching you for a long time, Mark.” The voice replied. “And what I want is…” She said as her paw reached down and started to unbutton my pants.
Knowing what mamono are capable of, I started to struggle a bit, but the other paw of the girl stopped my struggling rather easily.
“Don’t struggle, I don’t want to accidentally hurt you.” She said to me.
I stopped struggling because I don’t know what “hurt” meant, and judging by where her paw was, I didn’t want to know.
She successfully got my pants undone and pulled them down to my ankles, she then started to rub my crotch over my underwear. Unfortunately, she knew what she was doing so she got me worked up down there, both literally and figuratively. After I seemed hard enough to her, she started pulling down my underwear when I said this: “I don’t want this! I’m saving my purity for someone that I love.” I said.
“Oh, you have a crush on someone? I hope that she won’t mind what happens next.” She said to me.
I had a feeling of terror knowing what was going to come next. I froze when I felt something moist start to rub around my private region, I couldn’t see exactly what it was, but suddenly I felt it engulf my member. The wetness lubricated me and it suddenly started to move, and shift. The best description that I can think of is like 1000 little tongues dancing around my member, all in sync with their rhythmic movements. “Mmm, that tastes so good.” The mamono said.
Everything was starting to add up in my head. The thing wrapped around me, the paws, the comments. This girl a is a Manticore.
“You’re a manticore?” I asked the girl.
“You finally figured it out huh?” She said with a slight tease in her voice.
‘I can’t have my first time being taken by another manticore, it would be like insult to injury here.’ I thought to myself.
Her tail was still shifting and pulsating around me. I was started to get close to orgasm at which I started to panic and squirm. I didn’t want to be soiled.
The manticore just gripped me harder and said, “No no, I can’t have my meal running away at this point.”
‘Well, if I’m not going to get away, I might as well tell her to tell Christina to not be mad at me for what is happening. She lives in the same dorm, after all.’
“Hey, manticore.” I say to try to get her attention.
“What do you want?” She says.
“Well, since I’m about to be taken by you, can I tell you to tell the person I like that I’m sorry?” I ask her.
“I guess I can do that much.” She says. “What’s her name?”
“Her name is Christina, she’s a manticore like you. I want you to tell her that even though she doesn’t really know me, I think that she is beautiful. I love the way her hair flows down her shoulders and she always smells nice when she walks by me. I may not have talked to her too much, but from what I can see, she is a person that everyone loves… She is a person that I love. Ever since she chose to take the initiative and introduce herself to me instead of I to her. She is just a wonderful person and I hope that she can find happiness. I also want to apologize for me being taken by another person, even though she probably wasn’t going to be with me anyways. Nevermind… That’s a weird thing to say to a person that doesn’t even know me.” I say.
The tail of the manticore slowed down its movements. Wondering what was going on, I was about to ask what was going on when I heard a sniff. I then felt something wet hit my shoulder. Was she… crying?
“Are you okay? I know that’s a weird thing to say in this situation, but if there is anything I can do to help?” I said.
“No, Mark, there is nothing you can do to help.” She said, started to loosen her grip on me. I turned around to see the face of Christina crying with a huge smile on her face. “You can’t help because I am so happy right now.” She said to me.
“It was you the whole time?” I ask her.
“Yes, I didn’t think that you had feelings for me.” She replied back.
“I have always had feelings for you. I thought you didn’t think I existed, you never looked at me.” I said to her.
“I looked at you all the time, you never looked at me.” She said.
-Flashback time-
Mark is looking at Christina concentrating and is admiring her tail. He then realizes that he had to get back to work before the professor chewed him out. Immediately after he looks away, Christina looks at Mark and starts to smile and blush. She then looks down at her work: She has drawn a very well-done portrait of Mark, with a heart around him and she gives it a kiss.
-Flashback end-
“I never knew that you cared so much about me.” We said at the same time.
We both remained silent for a moment and they started to lean their heads closer to each other. Our eyes closed as our lips collided in a passion-filled kiss. Christina started her tail movements back up again.
Soon enough, I was getting close.
“Christina, I’m getting close.” I said to her.
“It’s fine, let it out, my tail will take care of everything.” She said back to me.
A few seconds later, I feel tense pleasure rushing through my body as I become sensitive to the touch. I fire my first load into her, and as she said, her tail seemed to suck it away.
“Mmm, it tastes so good.” She said to me. Still continuing her movements.
“Christina, I can’t go on, I’m drained.” I say to her.
“It’s no problem, I’ll just stick you with a barb.” She says to me.
“I’m terrified of needles though.” I reply back to her.
“I want you to stop talking and kiss me then.” She said to me.
I then proceeded to start kissing her again. All the while I am unaware that he tail has made its way to my thigh. I then felt the barb break my skin and start releasing it’s toxin.
“That wasn’t so bad was it?” She asks me.
“I guess not.” I say back to her.
I feel a warmth starting to spread throughout my body. My member starts to arise to full mast in no time at all.
‘Man, this stuff really works, doesn’t it. I feel refreshed.’ I idly think to myself.
“I’m going to blow your mind Mark.” She said to me.
I gulped a little in fear of what she was going to do. Her tail then swallowed me whole again. This time her undulating rhythm at a frantic pace. The pleasure that was going through my body was incomprehensible as he tail spiraled, sucked, pulsated, and licked my member. I was starting to get blurry vision.
“Christina…. I can’t… Go on… much longer.” I said with fatigue creeping into my voice.
“It’s okay Mark. I’ll keep going until you stop. You can fall asleep. I won’t leave you.” She said to me.
Seemingly moments after, I passed out. The pleasure was too much for my brain to handle so it shut down. I woke up the next day in my bed. On my nightstand there was a note. Opening it up it read:
Mark,
I’m sorry about what happened last night. I just couldn’t stand not being with you. You can’t imagine how happy I am with you. I’ll see you in class, and tonight I’ll give you a special present ;).
With love,
Your girlfriend, Christina.
I closed the note and had a smile plastered on my face. “I’m not going to live through this am I?” I said to myself before I headed to class where my girlfriend will be waiting for me.
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A 5 to counter the 3.
I couldn’t find a single typo. You’re off to a good start.
But then, I wasn’t looking for typos. I was more interested in reading the story.
Thanks to your comment, I really appreciate it!
Typos:
> mamano
> down it’s movements
> professor chew him
> releasing it’s toxin
> as he tail
> “I don’t want to accidentally hurt you”
Seeing as how manticores are described as sadistic, cruel creatures I find that a bit difficult to believe; even if she’s a “nice one”, there isn’t anything in the story to suggest that.
Given the reputation manticores have, after his love confession I expected her to go quiet and tail the ever-loving shit out of him
It seems strange to me that he would be so infatuated with Christina but not know what her voice sounds like after she abducted him
Whose perspective was the flashback from? All the rest of the story is from Mark’s perspective, but since he turned away from Christina there’s no way he would’ve seen what she did. That cutaway might make sense in a movie with visuals but it doesn’t really work here to me
The intro paragraph makes this story feel like a report or paper of some sort but everything else feels more like a diary entry, with the strong focus on his perspective it feels weird to me to open with “hello my name is Mark” – he knows his own name
The writing feels too blunt for such a personal story, it reads very matter-of-factly like a police report
This is something I used to do as well but you don’t need to put he said/she said/he asked after every quotation, so long as it’s easy to understand who’s speaking (IMO) you only really need to when you’re trying to show the speaker’s in an altered state, like if they’re confused, scared, angry, etc.
Thanks for pointing out the typos! I’m a little new to this so I don’t really know how to respond to these comments. For now I’ll just try to address some of your notes.
1. I know that manticores are supposed to be cruel, but I wasn’t really referencing her as caring by “not wanting to hurt him”. What I really meant by that quote is that Christina was worried that she would literally rip his manhood off of his body (ouch!). So that quote wasn’t really so much about her being a “caring” person per se, as a monster who didn’t want her meal damaged.
2.I get what you mean that you think it is strange for Mark not to recognize Christina’s voice. In one of the first paragraphs, I mentioned that Mark has tried to build up courage to try to talk to Christina, meaning that he hasn’t really had a conversation with her. I should have been more specific. Also, another reason that he possibly wouldn’t recognize her voice was due to the fact that his adrenaline would be pumping during the time that he was being dragged away. I personally thought that he would be focusing more on his attempt to escape rather than try to recognize the voice that was talking to him.
3. The flashback was a bit choppy, it didn’t really turn out how I wanted it to be. It also didn’t really have the best transition back into the story. To answer your question on the perspective, it was more or less a 3rd person view.
4. The opening paragraph was to introduce Mark to us. I could have started with something like: “Mark? MARK!” Said the professor to me while I was staring at the girl of my dreams… Or something like that.
5. In regards to this, this is one of my first stories, and also the first story on this site. I think that the flow of the writings will become better through time.
6. Thanks for the advice! That’s a good way to reduce the clutter and repeated phrases of the text so thanks!
My only problem was his odd babbling about Christina before being raped. Being scared, I’d think he’d keep it brief, but still flattering. Not enough to have her break out tears, but just dnough to makeher smile and get butterflies.
Thanks for the comment! I sort of get where you are coming from with this, but this part of the story had sort of the opposite feeling. If I personally was able to say any “last words”, then I wouldn’t hesitate to say literally everything that I wanted to say because the things that are unsaid will remain unsaid. Mark had the same idea in his head: He was about to be soiled by another monster, so he wanted to say all that he wanted to say before he climaxed inside another person. Also, regarding the second part. Mark didn’t know that this was Christina at this point, he didn’t think that his speech would actually affect the monster that was with him right now. Christina cried because she thought that Mark ignored her/possibly hated her. When she found out that she was completely wrong and the love of her life actually loved her, it moved her to tears.
Great story and keep the manticore love coming!
The two tags had me a bit confused when I first this. Still not sure if “reverse rape” is applicable in this one.
Regardless, I still found this enjoyable enough of a read in the end.
Keep going and you can only get better.
“ha ha ha.. what a story, Mark”
It could use a little more fleshing out, but it was quite nice for a quick read.