Tag Archives: alcohol

Blackstaff

12 votes, average: 4.50 out of 512 votes, average: 4.50 out of 512 votes, average: 4.50 out of 512 votes, average: 4.50 out of 512 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5 (12 votes) (4.50)

-Written for the Kikimora/Satyros contest a while back. This is the story of a Kikimora who wants to be an adventurer, encountering a drunken acquaintance, scheming mages, annoying Shoggoths, dark gods and far too many adverbs along the way-

“How the hell did you manage to get kicked out of a Bacchus temple for being drunk and disorderly?” Susan tried not to sound too impressed, but this really was a special feat. The temple was legendary for not giving a shit.

Kalista leaned forward, still swaying a little. “You ever hear of something called ‘Feeblemind’?” She asked with a grin.

“You mean that thing the Chaos worshippers drink for their rituals?”

“Yeah, that’s the stuff.” The cocky look on the Satyros’ face was replaced by confusion. She scratched her ear. “How’d you know?”

“You told me. You said you’d have to be insane to drink it.”

“…I did?” Kalista asked, looking distantly to the side in thought. Eventually she just shook her head and regained her cheerful composure. “Well, anyway, I was getting bored of the temple’s wine and fancied a change. So I got this bottle of the cultist’s stuff and thought it sounded like one hell of a party. Can’t really remember the rest…”

Susan sat upright with her eyes widened in horror. “You actually drank that stuff? Do you even know what’s in it?”

“Well, no.” Kalista said, downing the remains of her pint. “I wouldn’t really want to, either. I get the feeling it’d just put me off. Fancy another drink?”

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Bird’s Eye View: Chapter 1- Terms and Conditions Apply

30 votes, average: 4.73 out of 530 votes, average: 4.73 out of 530 votes, average: 4.73 out of 530 votes, average: 4.73 out of 530 votes, average: 4.73 out of 5 (30 votes) (4.73)

“If it’s not too much trouble, we’ll take you up on your offer. But first, you should meet your new homestay.”

I look around- surely it isn’t the redhead with patchwork skin on her face in the black and yellow jacket. She looks like she’s all business, and right now her business was babysitting this mysterious new guest and Smith. There was the other one off on the property somewhere that I caught a glimpse of on the way in.

As I turned to look around for her, I was aware of a darkness sweeping over me. It wasn’t a cloud- it was something else. Looking up, I briefly catch a silhouette of something with a distinctly feminine outline swooping down on me from above, a pair of outstretched feathery wings backlit by the glare of the sun.

An Angel?

Time stands still and that thought is quickly dispelled as something big whizzes by my head. Instinctively I raise my arm to shield my face, but the looming figure is gone just as quickly as she’s shown up.

And so is my Stetson.

I wheel around, not finding it on the ground right away. Still unsure of what’s going on, I see my hat being clutched in a pair of talons as a giant bird noiselessly flaps its wings over by Smith and the redhead. Only I can now see that its not a bird as the talons clutching my headgear hover a few inches off of the ground.

It’s a woman. A beautiful woman with feathery arms and a surprisingly voluptuous human figure whose legs tapered off to giant talons beneath the knees. The arms almost immediately taper off into almost surfboard-sized wings starting at the shoulder.

How can she fly with such a buxom figure? I thought harpies were supposed to be petite and slender for better flight efficiency. Her hair is platinum- almost white and she’s wearing a pair of denim cutoffs and a light colored tank top with spaghetti straps seemingly struggling to contain a rather impressive bust. With a quick kick of her talons, my hat was now being held loosely in one of her wings- a small clawed hand barely visible among her plumage as she hovers next to Smith.

Save for a tiny disdainful smirk flashed my way, she shows next to no emotion as she alights next to the woman in the dark suit.

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Stacy’s Mom (Has got it goin’ on)

56 votes, average: 4.57 out of 556 votes, average: 4.57 out of 556 votes, average: 4.57 out of 556 votes, average: 4.57 out of 556 votes, average: 4.57 out of 5 (56 votes) (4.57)

Tutoring the beautiful step-daughter of a beautiful Panda, will Ezra find more than he expected…

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Bachelorsville, Texas- Introduction: Beer And Loathing

9 votes, average: 4.56 out of 59 votes, average: 4.56 out of 59 votes, average: 4.56 out of 59 votes, average: 4.56 out of 59 votes, average: 4.56 out of 5 (9 votes) (4.56)

There’s no shortage of people out there who complain how boring life in their little town can get. I’m one of those seemingly rare people who happens to like it that way. Yet the solace and tranquility I found in small town life was doomed to come crashing down around me one scorching west Texas summer night.

I was making good time back from Odessa after dropping off a load of gravel for a customer and crossed the El Portal County line with a few hours to go before sunset that particular summer afternoon. Almost immediately after crossing the county line, I noticed a plume of smoke off in the distant hills.

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