I’m back! Well, this chapter just kept getting much bigger than I originally planned. Thus, this is the longest chapter I’ve written. It was hard as hell trying to get this done. Thank God I did. Hopefully the next chapters won’t take as long as this one did.
“Is this really necessary?” I asked Veina while sitting in a chair while a blank-faced Mantis stood in front of me, blades extended. Yes, the same cute, blank-faced Mantis that I rescued from the shitter. She better have taken a bath since that crappy experience.
“Look, you’ll always be sexy to me, my love. But I’m curious as to how you would look without that facial hair” she said, casually getting a manicure behind me.
“You want to see me as a PEZ dispenser?”
“You’ll be fine. I trust Naidy with my hair”.
Okay, I’ll be the first to admit that I’d been putting off a trip to the “barber” since I came into this world. Too much on my mind. In that time, I’d gotten to look rather… outback to say the least. So I wasn’t against a shave and a haircut for two bits. But an emotionless “assassin of the forest” dragging her two over-sized blades around my head is not what I had in mind.
“Let’s just get this over with” I groaned with a hard gulp. I hoped that she didn’t deep throat me with her massive cleavers.
Naidy spun my chair around and began trimming the back of my head. I had no idea just how the hell she was actually cutting my hair, nor did I wish to; I would probably panic and let the obscenities fly. All I knew what that she hadn’t drawn any blood… yet.
Actually, she was quite gentle; not trying to yank my head off my shoulders or gripping my head so hard I’d get an aneurysm, like those stupid ass automated barber shops back on Earth. Though she was just as unresponsive as those. This time, I could actually relax.
That is until she spun my chair around again and proceeded to mount my lap. She pressed her petite yet curvy body up against mine as she continued her work. Of course. Why the hell didn’t I see this coming? Speaking of coming, a blush had formed on her face and her breathing seem to increase. My ability to remain calm was rapidly fading. At least it didn’t seem to slow down her snipping. And thankfully I had a towel over me lap. I didn’t need her staining my pants.
“Just hurry up okay? I’m not paying for that kind of service” I said, trying to avoid eye contact with her cold eyes. Also, I was trying to ignore how lovely she smelled. Kind of a vanilla, rose smell. Sweet.
No reaction from Naidy, just more snipping… and loving it. I think.
Finally after what felt like an eternity, she finished trimming my hair, but didn’t dismount. She instead reached over and began covering her blades with some kind of strange smelling cream that seamlessly absorbed into her blades. Before I could ask what that was, she tilted my face and began shaving me with her unnecessarily large razor blades. Alright, I guess they lather the tool, not the face, but get the same effect. They got all kinds of methods to make things go stiff around here.
I sunk into the seat like a little kid. It wasn’t reasonable to expect it from Naidy, but a little warning would have been welcomed. Even though she delicately and harmlessly ran the blades my face, it did anything but instill my confidence in her. I kept imagining my face being sliced up like a big bologna.
Before long, she finished with my face and slowly removed herself from my lap. I quickly stood up and shot her a suspicious glare. Her blush only reddened even more.
“I’ll deal with you later” I said snarkly, as I made my way to a nearby mirror.
What a relief. I didn’t look like a double sided Two Face. In fact I looked pretty damn good. I mean as good as someone with my looks could be, but she actually did a great job. I was clean and smooth as can be. Nice.
“Hmm. Well thanks, Bug Eyes. Here, buy yourself a big grasshopper for lunch” I said as I tipped her one silver coin extra than what I actually owed her.
“Mmmmm. Very, very fine” said Veina as she came up behind me and looking into the mirror with me. “And I’m not the only one who thinks so…”
I looked over to Naidy who was now completely red in the face. She was quivering and breathing even heavier than before. Even without any change in her expression, it didn’t take much to figure out what was up. I don’t think she considered my extra coin her tip.
“Now that she’s climaxed, all she needs is a mate to begin devouring. And that’s not gonna be me” I said as I rolled my eyes and made my way toward the door, with Veina following me and giggling.
Bugs are bugs, I suppose.
We rode along in my cart toward Gamberton. I drove, Veina rode in the back. My back.
“Would you cut that out already?” I said as I finally ducked away from Veina sensually rubbing my shoulders from behind my seat.
“Oh don’t you enjoy it?” she mewed in a playfully sultry voice. “Well how does this feel?” I suddenly felt a warm, soft cushion press against the back of my freshly trimmed head. And it was pretty obvious that it wasn’t an electric heating pillow. It was too dirty of a pillow for that.
“You’ve been driving for nearly two hours, my love. I’m just trying to make this journey more comfortable for you. Do you need more pleasure? Because I’ve got much, much more charm than this” she chuckled. Forget playfulness; her voice was just good old fashion lusty.
“Do you ever stop thinking about trying to seduce someone? Oh that’s right. It’s your fucking job” I said, trying to block out how great her bust felt on my head.
“Correct you are but even so, why not? You’ve haven’t stopped seducing me all this time” she cooed.
Man, I hate this game.
“Just… shut up and amuse yourself. Whatever it is, do it quietly”.
“I already have amused myself on this trip. Multiple times” she said lewdly.
Oh man. She’s been doing that in my cart? Fucking hell, I better go find a sponge after this.
“That does it. Play time’s over. Sit up here” I patted the open spot next to me. “You’re not turning this into a Ho train”
She gleefully climbed up front and sat beside me. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see her staring at me.
“What should we do now, my love?”
“Since silence is not in the cards, let’s give casual chatting a try. Ask me something”
“Very well. Hmmm” she pondered. “What’s your favorite position?”
“Never mind. Guess I’ll have to ask the questions!” I groaned. “So besides thinking of sex, what else do you do with your day?”.
I was hoping I could get her mind off of those kind of topics.
“Well, mostly things that aren’t as pleasurable. Maintaining control over towns, countering the Order should they attack, reporting to the Maou. Just boring work. However the most fun part of my job is to spread the Demon Lord’s influence as far as possible. To create a Demon Realm, and have mamano and humans joined together, forever in eternal ecstasy” she said as she began to trail off.
“Fancy. When I wasn’t working, I usually just stayed home with movies or games” I said dryly.
“Oh come on now, Jason. You’re telling me that you don’t ever think of all the wondrous pleasures of the flesh?”
“There’s more trails in life than the trails that lead from one bed to another Morrigan. And frankly, you probably should lay off that kind of stuff. You’ll go blind”.
“So a life without eternal bliss is better? I’m sure life on your Earth must be rather boring, if you don’t mind me saying”.
Calling my Earth “boring” was being way too kind.
“A little bullshit in someone’s life can do them good. It teaches you not to give a rat’s ass about trivial matters”.
“I assure you, our pleasure is no trivial matter”.
“Yeah, well neither is our freedom. And I’d say that you and your crusading hippies are primed to stomp that into the mud”.
“Are you saying that we forcefully enslave men to our will?”
“Oh I suppose those charms spells of yours are just to get discounts at JC Penny’s, huh? I’m not blind. And speaking of enslaving, how many guys are going to be at this festival, being dragged around by a spiked collar? Will their be an exchange of fuck-buddies, too? How much were you willing to sell me for? A dollar-forty?”
Wow, with this sour mood I was in, I wondered ‘why was I going to this festival again?’
“Fear not. There won’t be anything of the kind, my love. Just happiness and fun. None of this misery and slavery that you strangely worry about. We don’t do that. Though I should warn you, some mamano and their husbands are into those kinds of games” Veina said anxiously rubbing her palms together.
Oh yeah. “Fun” was what I was hoping to find. And what could be more fun than Community Orgy Day at the fairgrounds? Fun for the whole family!
“Let me tell you something. I’ve been wrangled up by some mamano militia before. I’m no Dick Tracey but I’m pretty sure that they weren’t working for the fucking Salvation Army. And if they or your radicals end up trying to re-wrangle me today, you’re gonna hear lots of profanity not just from me but from these tiny terrors, right here at my sides” I threatened while showcasing a smug smile and patting my firearms; the only two friends that I still trusted.
I was anxious to hear her explain my little kerfuffle with this dimension’s welcoming party.
“Look Jason, I promised you that I would make you happy. And you agreed to allow yourself some fun, right? That said, must we argue right now? Today is about celebrating… together. So just trust me on this and enjoy yourself, okay?” she said as she hugged my arm and leaned against my shoulder.
How about that? She’s dodging the issue.
I could have pressed the issue harder and actually had many reasons to do so, but for whatever reason I didn’t. In the end, I did feel like letting loose and having some laughs. And she insisted on paying all of the costs for entertainment. Hey, who am I to turn down a paid-expenses vacation? So what the hell, I’ll cut her a break… for now. We could continue this little song and dance later.
“Fair enough. You want me to be happy and have fun? Well consider me a regular Ronald McDonald, minus the obnoxious voice” I said with a smirk. “But… you’d better be ready to tangle with me later” I admonished.
“Later? Why wait? I’m ready to ‘tangle’ with you right now… if you desire to” she said flirtatiously back at me, while rubbing my bicep into her cleavage.
“Son of a bitch. Enough with the sex innuendos. Just ask me a normal question, for once”
“Hehehe, very well. So have you been to any kind of festival before?”
Well what do ya know? She actually can stop thinking about sex for once. Good, there was still hope for normal conversations. Geez at this point, I’d be okay with listening to the ramblings of Veina’s coo-coo alter ego.
Since she was honest with me, I decided to be honest with her.
“Sure. Plenty of times. Went to a Disney laser dodgeball tournament once. A friend of mine snuck into a maintenance shaft in the VR room and began making Mickey Mouse’s voice system start cursing up a shitstorm. It was hilarious. But usually I spent my time with the midway games, the arcade, and rides. Old fashion, but still amusing. Providing that my friends didn’t get me into too much trouble” I said while laughing at my mischievous younger days. If she figures that out, she’s smarter than I thought. “How about you?”
Veina paused and let out a restrained moan.
“You are so very lucky that I’m not a rapist” she said with frustratedly lewd smile.
And we’re right back to the center of the damn shrubbery maze. Maybe I should cut down on my other-worldliness. She doesn’t need the encouragement.
We arrived at Gamberton later that day. Bigger than Vallick and a little classier. For one, there were primarily stone buildings as opposed to the wooden buildings that made up Vallick.
Instead of walking me toward the main entrance, which coincidentally was lined with visitors, Veina walked me toward a small gateway on the side. Worrying to say the least, but I still had my guns on me to help keep my cool.
“It’s me” said Veina, quite content with not giving more of an introduction. Pretty cocky, ain’t she? Well with how she looks…
The gate opened and she beckoned me to follow her. Inside, stood two large, muscular women with orange and black striped fur covering their arms and legs. They were equipped with menacing feline claws on their hands and feet. Not so menacing was their adorable little cat ears, their tails gently twitching behind their backs, as well as a tuff of white fur that covered their necks. They only wore decorative armor pads on their shoulders along with an armored bikini bottom and top, showing off their finely sculpted muscles. Although, I almost burst out laughing at how little sense an armored bikini was. Looked more like a combat chastity belt.
And buxom. Of course they were buxom. It seems par for the course everywhere I go.
I’d heard of these kinds of babes before. They were called Jinkos. Think of a Catian with a fetish for bodybuilding, MMA, and scratching posts. You wouldn’t get much emotion from these stone cold bombshells. At least not this time of year.
What’s new pussycat? Whoa oh.
Veina conjured up a few coins and handed them over to each of the ally-cats, then turned to me.
“Time for your payment, Jason” she said with a smirk.
“You’re expecting me to clean these dirty kitties’ litter boxes?” I sneered.
“No. What do you do with a cat?”
“Have them spayed?” With these two, it probably wasn’t a bad idea.
“Stroke them, Jason. Stroke them three times from their head, down to the end of their tail. It makes cats quite satisfied. Or we could just wait in the line at the main entrance, leaving less fun time for the two of us. I’ll wait till your done” she said as she leaned against the wall behind Clawdia #1 and Clawdia #2.
“I’ll get you for this” I pouted. Of course Veina would do this to me. But I was in no mood to protest and besides, people kill to get their hands on an easy-access pass for an amusement park back on Earth. And this wasn’t all that bad, considering. So I impertinently agreed to indulge them.
Both girls dropped down onto all fours. Their firm yet soft ass on full display. Yes several pussy jokes ran through my head.
I placed my hand on their heads. Apparently combat didn’t keep their hair from feeling like smooth, satin fabric. They both lifted their heads into my touch. I moved down their defined backs; their skin was quite tactile to say the least. I never gave much thought to muscles on girls, but I can say now that their was definitely a hell of a charm to it. I finished it off by lightly gripping their tails and sliding my hand down to the end. The fur on their tail was equally as pleasant as the head hair. Thankfully, their tail started before I got to feel their ass. That was one door, I didn’t want to open.
After repeating this two more times I stood up.
“There. A little nip for the cats. Now put your puss- eh butts down” I stuttered. I had to try and maintain a little class, at least.
Both Jinkos stood up and silently stared me down. No emotion from them except a slight blush and purring as loud as an engine. Guess I did a good job revving them up. They then returned to their post by the gate.
“Why the hell-” I began as I turned to Veina.
“It was part of the agreement I made so we could get in to the festival quicker. I paid them in money, you paid them in, well you already know. Though to be honest, I could have gotten both of us in without having to give them any kind of payment. But I’m nothing if not generous” she said with that bold smile of hers.
“You’re a regular Mother Teresa. Can we go enjoy ourselves now?” I mumbled.
“Anything to satisfy you, my love. Whatever you need to straighten yourself out, just let me know” she crowed with deep desire.
Damn Demon talk. And a shitty joke at that. Good thing I don’t make dumbass jokes like that.
Veina said it was a festival; more like a full blown amusement park. Even before I parked my cart, I could see quite a lot of, well for lack of a better term, foreign monster chicks roaming about. I guessed that they must have been from the surrounding lands that I hadn’t visited yet. Well, now’s a good time to scope out some of these chicks. Should a portal open up in one of their lands, it’d be best to know what’s waiting for me.
I spotted some Lamias, Raiju’s, Dark Elves, Centaurs, and many others. There were no Wonderland residents, however. That asylum-turned-circus of a “kingdom” was nothing but one big party so there was no real reason for them to come here and get their jollies. Whatever guys that were scattered about had their mamano “wives” clinging to their sides. They looked like mothers with their kids; holding on to them to make sure that they don’t wander off and start fooling around. In this case, in more ways then one.
Speaking of kids, there were lots of mini monsters running amuck. Screaming, crying, laughing, complaining, puking and all the other cute little things kids do. If this were Earth, all these kids would be on their cellphone headsets, yelling in their virtual chat rooms. At least here, when they went outside, they actually went outside.
It was pretty tough to tell how old they were. Call me a pedophile but these little girls were already starting to develop like their mommies. Now all little Earth girls start to develop in their teen years, and the boys definitely notice it around the same time. In this world, however, I’m guessing that an eight year old mamano can look like a sixteen year old human girl. When these mamano actually do turn sixteen, I can only imagine what kind of circus will be going on in the teenage boys’ pants.
Even without electricity or the industrial wet dreams of Earth, these mini monsters had all kinds of ways to have fun while also getting hurt at the same time. Ah, childhood. One of the first things I noticed was an ice rink. Yeah an ice rink, filled with plenty of monsters sliding around and butt planting just as much. How they got a stone cold, home-body like an Ice Queen to do that for them, I don’t know. Someone probably blackmailed her with some dirty pictures or something.
But that was just the tip of the iceberg. Shit joke, I know. I spotted what was either a Ryu water slide, or a wet shirt competition. If the latter, I’m betting on the Holstaur. Other kids were bouncing on a large, green jello thing-a-ma-jig. I could go for some jello; there’s always room for jello. That is until I realized that it was actually about twenty Slimes all bound together. Nevermind.
These mamano definitely had variety, that’s for damn sure. A Wurm was effortlessly rotating a big wooden wheel with kids sitting in it. Neat. Now all they had to do was pay some Centaurs, Unicorns, and Bicorns to stand on it and you’d have this world’s first merry-go-round. Nearby, there were some Griffons giving air rides to the kiddies, not fortunate to be born with wings. That has lawsuits written all over it. I wondered how they convinced Griffons to do something like that? Well, I guess it was easier than asking a Dragon to pluck the stick out of their stuck-up ass and taxi some kids around.
But what blew my mind most were some Dark Mages that magically conjured up some kind of telekinetic contraption, reminiscent of those old swing rides. Shit I hadn’t seen one of those back on Earth since the roller coaster takeover. That whole bullshit about the “future”, which was just an excuse for corporate fuck-wits to kill off all of their “old fashion” rides just to make more fucking room for those super coaster adventure rides. Waste of money. I missed the old school stuff. Hell I may just have to take a ride. That is if I can still fit my dead-weight, anvil ass in the seats.
“Where shall we begin, my love?” said Veina.
Hell if I knew. I couldn’t get a grip on this place. On one hand, their was no electricity, motors, or any other industrial forms of entertainment. But they did have this crazy magic shit. That made it a whole new ball-game. Oh well. Shot in the dark, thrown in the deep end, crash course, and all those other analogies for ‘fuck it’.
“Let’s check this out” I said as I pointed toward a nearby stand.
In the stand was a Minotaur; tanned skin, ragged hair, and two large cow horns sat on her head. Her body was beefy and muscular, but in a more brutish way than the Jinkos. Only two strips of belt covered her sizable mounds and her furry legs barely covering her privates, if at all. Her stand was obviously a test of strength; something about smashing statues with a giant ass hammer. For the record, I would have killed to see this Minotaur in a clown suit, shooting seltzer down her pants.
She had a Lava Golem and a Yuki-Onna on standby.
I decided to sit nearby and watch an Ushi-Oni, a Wurm, and a Hellhound compete. The inhuman strength of these girls was always fun to watch.
“Unless she plans to melt that statue into clay, that mutt’s in trouble” I muttered to Veina.
It was pretty easy to predict the outcome of this match. The Wurm won by easily shattering her statue like a Black Friday Apple computer. Coming in first place, she was awarded with a potion that would keep her husband conscious… no matter how much she “pleasured” him. I pity the fool. The Ushi-Oni shattered about three-fourths of her statue, earning her second place; some patches of Raiju fur, I guess to add a spark into her love life with her husband. Teehee, whatever. And that poor little Hellhound only managed to bust the head off of her statue, leaving her to walk back toward her husband with only her tail between her legs. Hey, at least she still came in third place.
“Hey there, Tiny” said the Minotaur looking over to me. “You look young and in prime condition. Care to give it a swing? Don’t worry, since you’re not an incubus, I’ll let you take a swing at the kids’ statue. That seems fair for someone as small and cute as you” she said, followed by a condescending laugh.
Obviously a shot at how puny I was to most other dudes here. Call me crazy, but even a six foot seven, ripped monster broad with a massive, fuck-off ax wasn’t enough to get me to hold my acid tongue. I may have risked an ass-kicking, but I didn’t give a fuck. Hey, besides the banana, I like to think I’ve got some good grapefruits between my legs.
“Thanks but I’m good. Tell me, does that five o’ clock shadow come naturally or do the steroid sundaes alone give you that Jewish Wyatt Earp look?” I said firing her condescending tone right back in her face.
Okay she may not have understood exactly what I said, but I’m still counting that as a ballsy move on my part.
Her smile turned sour which hinted that she vaguely understood my insult. Well good for her. She’s not a complete muscle-brained idiot after all.
“We’ll pass” said Veina interjecting into our little scrimmage. The Minotaur shrugged and walked off to prepare for her next customers, and also to get her Lava Golem and Yuki-Onna to start prepping three more statues. So that’s where they came from.
“Bitch” I hissed after she left.
“Now, now Jason. Believe it or not, she liked you. That’s how Minotaurs show their affection” said Veina.
“Yeah, reminding me that I don’t physically compare to those jacked-up incubus bastards? Her talk sure is sweet”.
“You know, I could fix that for you if it bothers you that much…” she said as her tongue danced around her lips.
Let her fix something for me? I wouldn’t trust her with my drawer of underwear.
“In your dreams. I’ve lost everything else, and I’m not gonna lose my humanity” I asserted. As if looming threats from Skarliks weren’t bad enough, the last thing I wanted to worry about was growing a bigger penis and horns and I don’t what else. Depends on what sick thoughts are swimming around in Veina’s lust-flooded mind.
“Of course. One step at a time” said Veina as she traced her claws along my shoulder.
I shot her a disgruntled mug complete with a low growl.
“So forget about that now. We’re here to enjoy ourselves. Now, you seem to be having a little trouble getting started. Would you please allow me to lead you, my love” she said resting her head on my shoulder and gleaming at me with those sexy puppy eyes.
I wouldn’t be shocked if she brought me to a nudist-colony-turned-art-gallery or something even more insane than that. But the hell with it. At least I’d get to do some sight-seeing.
“Full steam ahead, Spawn” I said with a heavy sigh.
“Well, let’s go. Follow close behind me, love. I wouldn’t want to lose you and cause a scene looking for you. Though I assure you wouldn’t be without me by your side for long” she said with a sinister laugh.
That had to be her censored way of saying that I was her prisoner; her prisoner that she adored, that is. This dame was drunk on me, and she hasn’t even tasted me yet.
Following behind her, I sure got an eyeful of her backside. As she lead me along, her lovely hips gleefully puppeteered her perfect ass with that infamous strut of hers. Oh I’m sure the fact that her hand, that was holding mine, occasionally brushed my hand against her soft but firm ass was just a happy coincidence on her part. Well played, you saucy little devil.
We began our “joy ride” by winning some prizes at the game stands. Now I hadn’t partaken in these kinds of games since I entered college. I was more worried about being dumped by a scholarship than winning a plushy the size of a silver-back gorilla. Basically, a guy can build up an awful lot of rust on his precision skills in that time. But to my surprise, I still had my knack for this shit. Either that or Lady Luck gave me a clean streak rather than a black eye, for once.
We visited a game stand where we had to throw rings over dildos, haha. Another stand we threw darts at some Slime bubbles, yipee. Also we went to a stand where we had to squirt water into the mouths of a cut-out Succubus. Back on Earth, we aimed at clown heads in this game. Great, now I can never “un-see” the perversion if I ever play this again on Earth. Even without these phallic shaped guns.
It turns out that Veina has a bit of a competitive side in her. Whatever the game, she insisted that we compete to see who does better. Now this chick may have been sexy enough that no surgeon could work on her without being Pearl Harbored by adultery lawsuits, but this was one area that I was going to outperform her in. Hehe.
“I win again” I boasted. Each time we had played a round in this “coin derby”, my coin rolled significantly farther than hers. All in the wrist.
“I guess you really are quite skilled, aren’t you?” Veina said, finally accepting the truth.
“Four out of seven or five out of nine?” I continued goading her.
“No, nevermind” Veina glowered as she found herself unable to mask her frustration.
Hope they had some popcorn here, because she had plenty of salt to go around.
It sure was fun to tease her for a change. I’ll try to remember this the next time she decides to play the game of “sexual predator”. For now though, I was walking away with an armful of victory spoils and she walked away with only one prize. I got a couple of perverted plushies, also a bottle of body oil for those who want to turn their lovers into a slip n’ slide. Last but not least, I got a pillow shaped like a giant penis. Great, now I’ll always wake up with morning wood.
Sure Veina beat me in the mamano trivia, go figure. She got an Arachne coat out of it. Good she’ll need that to hide her embarrassment of a mere human besting her in a physical contest. Was I too much to handle?
Son of a bitch. I forgot how competitive I could be.
“No hard feelings, right?” I asked her as I struggled to hold all of my loot. I was completely on Veina’s tab. I don’t know where she kept conjuring up so many coins from, but it never seemed to stop. And there was no expense she wouldn’t pay on my behalf. My own sexy little ATM.
Since she had “paid for my movie tickets” so to speak, I did feel a little bad for teasing her. A little bit… but mostly it was just plain fun.
“Not at all, my love. Here, let me get those for you” she said as she grabbed some of my prizes.
Veina had opened a glowing purple bag and began dropping my winnings into it. Strange. Where did that bag come from? Even stranger, the bag never seemed to fill up as everything seemed to disappear inside it. Even the giant dildo couldn’t fill what became my victory glory hole.
After packing everything in, Veina snapped her fingers and the whole bag disappeared in a purple puff. She told me it was her way of storing items. Gives a whole new dimension to the term “cloud storage”.
“Alright. What game shall I spank you at now- wait! Forget I said that” I interjected into my own question before I triggered her masochistic side. “What I meant to ask is what’s next?”
Veina chuckled at my little slip-up and said,
“Well games are lots of fun, but what say we move on to the more ‘extravagant’ attractions?” she said with her lewd smile now fully resurrected. Man, you can’t keep this girl cooled off for long.
“Tired of being defeated by a silly little human? I understand. Who says you need to be an incubus to show that you’re a real man?” I smuggly teased as I challenged her smile with one of my own. Sure these incubi were big, muscular, and handsome, but with my gaming skills, I now had the biggest dick in town.
I shouldn’t have won that damn pillow. Now it’s all I can think about.
Veina wasn’t phased by my antics, and instead grabbed my hand and said, “We played your games. Now for something more along my lines”.
I tried to prepare myself for her next move in this little chess game of ours. Wouldn’t want to get check-mated, would I?
What followed was what you might call a tourist trap, literally. Veina was the know-it-all tour guide and I was the oblivious, wide-eyed tourist who should have stayed in bed that morning. We entered the more… erotic part of the festival. And with all these, mostly, single mamano around, I felt like a pin-up girl in a stripper bar full of drunken jack-offs. Veina was my bouncer, and no fucking way was I leaving her side. That meant I was entirely in her hands with whatever sick fantasies she cared to partake in. But I wasn’t going to let her know that.
Fortunately for me, she seemed content with only spectating at these perverted attractions, not participating in them. Of course that just provided her more opportunities to get reactions out of me, which she greatly enjoyed. But I’d take that over the alternative.
First place she stopped at was… well for lack of a better term, the tunnel of love. Oh, shit soup. I guess the local Ryu simply couldn’t resist providing more than just a mere water slide. I stood directly behind Veina as she slowly ran her hands down the rollercoaster-like curves that were her unbelievable figure. Letting out a sensual sigh once she reached her hips, her tail then rose up, mischievously tracing her spaded tip from my crouch up to my chin. Then she turned to me, a Grinch-like smile on her face with her arms crossed in a way that nonchalantly flaunted her generous bust. They say an image is worth a thousand words. In Veina’s case, an image of her was only worth two words: ‘Fuck me’.
I think she was dropping me a hint.
“Forget it” I stammered, not wanting to even imagine how filthy those boats were. Come to think of it this whole damn town could be filthy as fuck. Yet the fact that I could potentially get an STD just by sitting on a bench didn’t worry me much. Now, the fact that she wasn’t at all phased by my rejection did have me worried. Tremendously.
Next, we stopped at a game of spin the bottle. Innocent enough. But this spin the bottle didn’t stop with just a little kiss and snickers from the crowd. Oh boy. That was only a few steps away from a sex competition, with judges and everything. You think I’m joking? Bullshit, I’m joking! There actually was a sex contest only a few steps away from the spin the bottle game. What the, literal, fuck? You’d have to be a freak to show off your true colors, if you know what I mean. Is there really a loser in a contest like that?
Veina chuckled at my dumbfonded stare.
Moving along, I we sat down near a stage. I had managed to convince Veina to pass on the “Sandy the Scylla and her SeMen” show. Don’t ask. One by one, some guys came trotting out onto the stage dressed in speedos that were, somehow, even smaller than a WWE reject. Only these poor bastards weren’t incubi. Back on Earth, only degenerates and jackasses had that misplaced level of confidence. Either that or some alcohol and drug abuse could make you go full Reefer Madness like that. Whatever the case, they seemed to be putting on quite an enthusiastic performance, as well. The girls were cheering vigorously as each guy pulled off some moves that no child-bearing male should do. Oh, of course. A bachelor auction. But given how the mamano babes always had one hand under the table, they wouldn’t be bachelors for long.
After the bachelorette party, Veina brought me to some kind of mini stadium. Long story short, it was time for some sports. What kind of “ball” games were they gonna play here, I wondered. The arena was packed with plenty of obstacles and other structures. Team one: the Cupids; team two: the Manticores. The targets: the sorry sonsabitches sitting in starting gates like racehorses before the flag is raised. The goal: score more points than the other team. Score points? By shooting those sorry motherfuckers with an arrow or spine, turn them into the girls’ brand new, lust-filled, jackhammer of a husband, and then go to town. I’d love to see this sport’s version of John Madden.
I angrily glared at Veina over this sick Mario Party minigame. She must have anticipated my incoming rant and cut me off. She explained how these guys were not there against their will, but were willing participants, as evidenced by even more human guys visibly warming up outside the stadium walls with no “security” to keep them in place. They must have been the next contestants, or the next lambs to the slaughter, take your pick.
I thought back to everything I’d seen previously that day. Any guy that I had seen here today was with his wife, that was clear. If they were brainwashed zombies, I figured every “couple” would look like a Walking Dead porno come to life. I mean, if mamano were going to make them into their sex slaves, it would make sense to turn them into a zombie and strip them of their free will, then of course their clothes. Yet strangely, the atmosphere really wasn’t too different from an amusement park back on Earth, except for the feeling of, somehow, being even less sanitary. I’d heard men and their mamano wives chatting, laughing, screaming at their kids, you know, the usual stuff couples do. They seemed perfectly happy. No chains or or leashes to ensure they know who’s the beauty and who’s the bitch. Just two people perfectly content with each other…
But, then again, what guy wouldn’t be content if a voluptuous woman with a killer combination of boobs, ass, lips, and legs, well sometimes legs, was eager for him to ‘play’ with her? Sure my zombie theory may have been a bit extreme, too much late night sci fi, but my reservations about mamano’s intentions wasn’t broken. So far as I was concerned, Veina’s assurance that there wouldn’t be any sex traffickers was holding up. That’s all. But it didn’t mean that there were no sex ‘offenders’ around here.
After the Manticores defeated the Cupids, I convinced Veina to leave. I didn’t need to see the winners collect their “prizes”. Upon exiting the stadium, I noticed a big ass line of mamano leading to a table with a shirtless incubus stud sitting at it. I hadn’t seen a line that long since Star Wars Episode 30: Revenge of the Jedi Menace.
“Hey. What’s with Tatum Von Pimp over there?” I asked Veina. From the looks of it, each girl got to hug the big lug and left with a small bottle of something.
“Him? That’s Brailo, one of the Demon Lord’s top negotiators. I’d heard he was going to make an appearance here today. He’s got a bit of a reputation, as you can see. Single mamano eagerly anticipate touching him and getting a sample of him in a bottle” Veina gushed.
Sample in a bottle? I’ll think it was better left unknown as to what kind of “sample” he was giving out. Fucking gross.
“Negotiator, huh?” I muttered contemptuously. I remembered back to my first day in this world when I almost made the tryouts for that role. Even after seeing this meat-head in person, I don’t regret turning it down. I’d seen his kind before. Back on Earth, they originated from that magical little land where the dishonest and selfish tap-dance all over the corpses of the weak. It was called Hollywood. And this guy sure fit the bill; good-looking, Schwarzenegger-like body, money, was treated like royalty wherever he went, and fucked so many chicks regularly that his bedroom probably had a queue path. A, literally, cocky son of a bitch, with a really punch-able face.
Just another average celebrity.
“You know of the Demon Lord’s negotiators?” said Veina as she probably noticed the silent disgust in my eyes.
“Never heard of them!” I snapped back. White lies, white lies.
“Jealous?” Veina deviously chimed in, probably not buying my fibbing.
“Hardly” I sneered as I turned away from the bastard.
Veina’s eyes lit up and I think I could see the literal light bulb above her horns.
“I’m surprised. Not just because of your disinterest in such an esteemed role, but that no one has brought you before the Demon Lord herself for consideration. I suppose that’s why you’ve ‘never heard of them’, right?” Veina joked as she cocked her head in front of mine.
I’ve gotta work on my poker face.
“But now that you know about it-“
“No fucking way! I’m not going up to that selfish prick and ask for an application” I cut her off. Though to be fair, Veina would probably be a credible reference for my resume that I didn’t have. “Besides, the line is too long”
Next, I found myself following Veina into some kind of stone cathedral. Large and imposing, like a prison. Inside we turned toward a hallway with ten doors, five on each side. By each door stood a Lich, silently reading her spell book. Not paying any attention to us as we passed. Veina opened the last door and gestured me to enter.
“After you, my love” she said with a spry smirk.
I guess that I got too damn complacent with her devilish mannerisms because I foolishly entered the small room, only to have her follow me and shut the door behind her. By the time I turned around, the door had begun to glow with a yellow haze.
Fuck, was this it? Veina’s attack? Was it going to come down to me and Veina brawling over who ends up ‘on top’?
“Don’t tell me your ‘no rape’ clause just expired” I questioned Veina as I moved my hand to my gun. Always good to be prepared for whatever her next move was gong to be.
“Calm down, Jason. Nothing of the kind” she said back with a charmed tone.
“Then what am I serving time for?”
She sat down on the sofa and sensually crossed her legs.
“Remember what I told you about your mana?”
I nodded back to her. What was she scheming now?
“Good. Well, I have some friends that I’d like to introduce you to. They’d would love to take in some of that erotic aura you so proudly boast”
Can you believe this woman? She goes and locks me in a room just so her friends can take a whiff?
“So… you want to use me as a side show attraction?”
If this turned out to be a sex-ed class, I’m charging right through that door.
“Mmmhhh, in a way. They’ll determine how strong your mana is. And if your mana is especially good, then you’ll be rewarded” she said with a pondering look on her face.
“Long story short: you entered me into a ‘sexiness’ contest!?” I said, my Sherlock Holmes skills kicking in.
She answered with a devilish grin and began pompously looking over her nails.
“Forget it! I’m not doing this! Lich, take your nose out of that damn book and open the door!” I detested, trying my damnest to keep calm.
“It’s okay, Jason. They’ll just-” Veina said.
I childishly plugged my ears and rambled on. “Not listening, princess! Just need to get out of here. Hey bookworm! You better open up! Now!”
With no response from the Lich on the other side, I began ramming the door until I felt something break. Yeah I think something broke alright, my shoulder. So much for plan A.
I pulled my gun and began firing onto the lock. My shots simply disappeared into the yellow haze with a ripple effect. Even though I’m immune, I’m starting to hate magic.
“Sorry, but a concealment spell can’t be broken that easily. So what will your next move be, my love?” Veina slyly pondered as she cupped her chin in her hand.
“Find a weak wall and put my head through it” I frustratedly chimed back at her as she continued to tease me.
She began to laugh. I couldn’t tell if it was more giddy or mocking.
“Like usual, you’re never boring to be around. You’re so much fun to play with. This’ll be a no contest”
“You got a little Dark Elf in that pointy head of yours? Why would you do something like this, you sick freak?” I sneered, searing with contempt.
“We have to lock the doors. Wouldn’t want anyone to get a sneak peek at the contestants before curtain time, would we? But to answer your question, I entered you into this because I adore you so much”
“What in the blue hell does that mean?”
“Well besides the fact that I just couldn’t resist seeing your reaction, they hold this contest every year. Grouping all of the sexiest men into one place, of course, makes this one of the most popular competitions. And I just so happen to have found the sexiest man that I have ever seen. So I figured it would be an easy win for you.
A little bread with all that buttering up, Veina?
“Yeah, what’s the point of having the best boy toy if you can’t make everyone jealous of you?” I said sarcastically.
“Indeed” she giggled.
“You’re kidding” I said, shooting her an exasperated glare.
“Oh come on, now. You know what I mean. It’s like when you get a special toy penis charged with a Raiju’s energy. That’s not something that comes along every day. Wouldn’t you want to show it off?”
Of course. Who hasn’t wanted to parade around with an electric sex toy from their night stand? Godammit, she was more competitive than I thought.
“You really need to get into something more constructive. Or just spend a couple years in college and grow up”
“It means everything to mamano to have the best lover we can. It’s our pride and passion. And pleasure” she said as she answered my glare with a lascivious grin.
“News flash, I’m not a rubber penis to pass around your book club”
“Don’t worry. These judges will only examine you and your mana, not violate you. So have no fear. I’ve made it very clear to them what would happen if they did more than needed. If they tried to take you from me…”
There goes that spark of insanity in her eyes again.
She grabbed my hand and warmly rubbed my cheek.
“I promised you would be safe, my love. And I meant it. No one is going to harm you or rape you without answering to me. It’s just that… I’m so fortunate to have found you. And what I have planned for our future together, well, I’m just finding it hard to contain my… impulses. But in the meantime, is it so wrong to make the other girls jealous? It’s just for fun. That said, it would truly delight me to have you participate in this contest. My love for you is so great and I’ve been looking for a chance to show off how truly special you are on a grand stage. To let everyone know that you are mine”
“You’re gloating, you know that right?”
“I am indeed. But lavishness is seen as a bit of a status symbol for us Demons. Besides, we find it fun to compete with each other. However, if you really don’t wish to be here, then we may leave right away. No questions asked. I won’t force you to do something you don’t want to do. But that is going to be your choice. So what do you say, my love?”
Really? She’s leaving the answer up to me? I could just say ‘no’ to this overblown show and tell?
Damn her, again. She really was just as devious and cryptic as she was stunning. Yet, oddly, no matter how many times I idiotically ended up playing into her little games, she never jumped me. She literally had me trapped, so why didn’t she go full BDSM? Just what the hell was she waiting for? I was starting to feel stupid walking around with my back against the wall for these past weeks. Waiting for the the figurative, or literal for all I knew, knife in the back, that I cynically expected, was driving me nuts. But it wasn’t coming. Any flirtatious and beautiful woman, let alone a fucking Demon with a figure more ‘stiffening’ than a bus full of viagras, was not to be trusted. I damn well knew this… so why the hell am I needing to convince myself to not trust her? Why does it seem like I was wrong about her?
“Hmmm. Sure, why not?” I said as it took a second to register what I was actually saying. I agreed?
“Splendid, my love! You’ll be the toast of the entire festival. And you’re all mine…” she lewdly cooed.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, I’m a real sport. Now what do I have to do to get out of this in one piece?” I asked.
“Just be your usual sexy self and you’ll do just fine” she said assuringly as she opened a portal behind her.
“By the way what’s the prize for winning?” I asked.
“I’ll tell you after you win, my love. So don’t worry and enjoy yourself” she teased just before she alluringly stepped into the portal with a rock of her hips.
‘Enjoy myself’? Oh boy.
For the next hour, I paced back and forth trying to reason in my mind why I agreed to this. My survival instincts told me to stay alert, but up to this point, she upheld her word and hadn’t let anything happen to me. So I guess I trusted her to a small degree in that sense. Besides, it was a much better alternative than pulling out my little friends and going full Scarface as I broke out of this room. Let’s make that plan E.
Finally, someone cut the juice on that magic door crap and it opened. In walked a hot, green-scaled Lamia. She was wearing a revealing lingerie top and a skimpy skirt. Her human upper half was slender but curvaceously alluring. Golden hair reached down past her nice hips. Speaking of her hips, her lower snake half was long, yellow accented, and thick. It definitely looked powerful as she slithered into the room and locked her bright golden eyes on mine. Another busty, smoldering hot monster chick. What else is new.
Before I could give her a snarky greeting, she was instantly in front of me. Swiftly yet gently, she wrapped her arms around my neck and began to coil her lower half around me just as fast. I didn’t get a chance to protest before she had me wrapped up like a Christmas present.
“Hey, hey, hey… I… what do you think-” I protested.
“Damn. Veina wasn’t kidding when she told me about your mana” she breathlessly said as she pressed her head against mine and blushed bright red. Her coils seem to shift restrictively while caressing every inch of me. Though she had left just enough of my upper body exposed to rub her large chest against it.
“Yeah well she also said no violating or didn’t you get the threatening memo?” I stammered. Seeing as how I couldn’t move any other part of my body, my mouth was my only weapon.
I didn’t know I was kinda claustrophobic.
“Yeah I know. No sex or touching of your genitals. No violating, I got it. Though that may be… harder… than I originally… thought…” she trailed off, losing herself to the hormone cloud.
They won’t violate me, huh? They’ll only examine me, I grumpily thought back to Veina’s little “assurance” to me. Sex is violating. But groping, smelling, humping, grinding, and all that stuff wasn’t considered violating to a mamano? That little, deceiving, Satan slut. I’m gonna kill her when I get out of this mess. Shouldn’t expect any less from-
I was interrupted from my thoughts when she started to tighten around me. Holy mother of fuck, she was strong.
“You’re great to squeeze, you know that hot stuff?” she bawdily sighed.
“Hey ugh… ease… ease up… there… ugh… snake eyes!” I managed to squeak out like a mouse. How fitting.
“Sorry, stud. Kinda lost control there. Hehehe” she giggled timidly. “You’re quite the specimen aren’t you? I could stay like this forever”
“Yeah, but you wouldn’t want someone to think that you’re violating little ol’ me” I growled at her as I gasped for air.
“C’mon. You know it feels great”
“Really? For who? You, belt bottom?” I said as I tried my best to untangle myself from her coils. Came close too.
“Oh please. Keep it up. You’ll definitely get a better rating if you struggle” she gushed with a lovely red blush covering her face.
How do you like that? Now I could be accused of rigging the contest.
For the next half hour, she continued her viola- I mean “examination” of course. We engaged in small talk, chatting about this and that. She had a way of making even the simple question of where I got my hair cut sound luscious. However she took in my mana, at least I could just talk and not have to drop my pants and bend over. My acid tongue only serving to entice her arousal, thus causing her to sensually “embrace” me a little too hard occasionally. Ouch.
Truth be told, her snake half actually felt pretty nice. Kinda like being tucked into a big cozy blanket. A blanket that squeezed the shit out of you from time to time, but also pleasantly massaged your body in full. Granted being fondled by a gorgeous girl who was literally wrapped around me was also a plus. If only I wasn’t sour over Veina’s little deception, I could have enjoyed it a little more.
Once Scaley’s time was up, she released me begrudgingly and slithered her way back to the door.
“You don’t have a brother do you?” she asked turning back to me, still blushing.
“Fat chance, Rattle Head; he’s married” I said as I stretched my body out of its cylinder-like shape.
“Really? What did he marry?”
“A pain in the ass. That’s what. Besides he’s much further than you could travel”
“I’d travel the world over to find him; to have him in my grasp” she said disappointed but aroused.
“I bet you would” I muttered as she left the room.
A few minutes later, I had just gotten myself stretched back into shape when the door opened again. Hopefully the next “judge” won’t be as binding as the last one, I thought to myself. As I began to turn around, something big, gooey, and heavy suddenly splashed on top of me.
Clearing the orangish goop out of my face, I saw the same goop about a foot in front of me in a more “womanly” form. Either the blob took up a career in pornos, or I just got jumped by a Red Slime.
Sexy as usual, although a Slime could be whatever form it damn well pleased.
She slid toward me and hugged my torso, resting her head against my chest. The slime that was still covering my shoulders began to trickle down my back like it had a mind of its own. It traveled up and down and around my body in slimy, sticky sensation. Yeah even in my ass crack. I could feel the force from her moving the slime around, but not in a restrictive way like the Lamia. Just… messy. I felt like someone was rubbing warm vaseline over my body but it was still kinda comfortable. Soothing, in fact. It wasn’t the first time I felt this kind of slimy sensation in this world.
Meanwhile, the Red Slime continued to cling to me, soaking into my coat and shirt. At first she only made soft moans and sighes. Eventually, she looked up to me and asked,
“What’s your name?”
“Mmmmhhhh. Sexy. Like Veina said”
“Please tell me you wash out with soap, slimeball” I jabbed, feeling her dampness seeping through my coat.
“All of you… nice. Veina. Lucky” she sighed as she began to doze off.
“Eyes open, booger brains” I snapped giving her a shake. I didn’t want her to fall asleep and drown me.
Unlike the Lamia, this half hour felt long. Mainly because of the Red Slime’s timid personality and short attention span. She only really talked when she asked a question. She hardly ever answered me. What’s the good of wise cracks if no one is around to hear? Instead, she simply oozed her way around my body, giving me the closest thing to a Nickelodeon slime shower there was in this world or mine. I always wanted one of those as a kid. And here I was getting the ‘adult’ version of it.
After her half hour, she melted off of me, taking all of her slime with her. My body and clothes felt surprisingly dry, considering; not even moisture in my armpits. Eww, I bet she took that with her. She collected all of herself and gave me a simple wave and sweet smile before exiting.
I don’t care how dry I felt, I wanted a tomato juice shower after this.
A few more minutes later, the door opened again. Well, maybe this time I won’t get a girl as slimy as the last. In walked, and I use the term “walk” loosely, a large white, pink, and black mass of tentacles with a similarly colored girl attached to it. An extremely alluring figure, even more so than I expected. On top of her long, draping pink hair sat a large black dome with pink, shining dots on it. A Kraken, no doubt about it. Fabulous. Now I got a girl both binding and slimy.
How the fuck does a Kraken move on land anyway?
“Shall we begin?” she murmured as she extended her arms at me, putting her glorious knockers on full display.
I halfheartedly extended my arms and put on a contemptuous grin.
“Awww. You’re not gonna start fondling me without giving a warning?” I said sarcastically.
“If you insist…” she giggled lustfully.
“Wait, no! I was just kidd-“
Her two longest tentacles reached out to me like lightning and lurched me toward her awaiting bosom. Instantly, her other gooey tentacles tangled around my body and limbs, robbing me of my freedom.
Me and my big mouth. That’s the thing about having an acid tongue; you sometimes burn your own mouth.
My time with Ms. Calamari was what I came to expect. Her caressing and groping me with her human parts and really caressing and groping me with her inhuman parts. Slimy and sticky, but also pleasant, in a strange kind of way but I was getting pretty used to that, lately. I could tell she was strong as hell, but she seemed to handle me with kid-gloves. Unlike the Lamia and Red Slime, she was actually gentle; passionately sliding her long, greasy appendages over every inch of my body. She firmly gripped my limbs as well as some personal parts. Like wrestling a big titillating tongue.
I had always wondered if that black outfit they had was actually clothing. Aesthetically, it looked somewhat like a dress, which only covered up the bare minimum. Now I was able to get a really good look at it. A fantastic “hands-on” look at it. While it must have been some kind of membrane it seemed more like a sticky stocking that women wore on their legs. Only denser yet just as thin. Also just as effective for displaying her lupine features.
“Fine frame, strong body, smooth face, unique dialogue, and incredibly strong spirit energy. And here I thought Veina was talking nonsense. But now I see how you are of excellent caliber, fit to be by the side of someone like Veina. You will make an exquisite mate. Maybe we can both talk to Veina and convince her to share you. Would you like that?” she sensually lulled as she continued toying with me.
Oh for the love of ass. How many of her friends did she brag to? Was she handing out pamphlets about me? Hold on. Don’t tell me she really did put a camera in my bathroom… somehow!
“You say that as if Veina was unique. She’s not the only horny, big breasted, sex wagon this world has to offer, Octopussy” I rebuked, having had enough of these “examinations”. Sure they felt good… really good, and their voluptuous human features being snuggled against me was, well let’s just say that it made me feel alive. But being touched in weird places by complete strangers was awkward and embarrassing for me.
And I’m sure each girl noticed each time I stiffened.
“Yes but someone of her status deserves a worthy husband”
“Wait. What do you mean ‘someone of her status’?”
“Well, after her considerable contribution to the conquering of Lescatie, she put herself in even higher ranks than most of her fellow Demons. It seemed odd to everyone that someone like her was not attached”
Lescatie? That was a major nation that fell under the Demon Lord’s control thanks to Druella and her radicals. And Veina was pivotal in Lescatie downfall, not just a soldier, so to speak? I guess Veina had a few more secrets she hadn’t disclosed to me yet.
After the usual half hour, the Kraken released me. Wait, that doesn’t sound right. Shouldn’t it be reversed? Whatever.
“If you should become a negotiator, can I be the first person you visit?” she asked as she held my hands to her… heart. Yeah, let’s just say her ‘heart’.
“If I ever get a hankering for sea-food, I’ll shoot you a call” I sneered back, as the Kraken’s white face reddened even more.
“You won’t regret it” with a smile of pure ecstasy.
“You best start your deliberation process. Think of your ‘enchantment under the sea’ fantasy later” I said as I pointed toward the door.
“Yes of course. Silly me” she said as she let go of my hands and slithered or scooted or whatever out the door.
A few minutes later, Veina entered.
“Have fun? I know the girls sure did” she gushed, displaying that lecherous smile that was growing all too familiar.
“No violations, just ‘examinations’, huh?” I scoffed while glaring daggers at her.
She simply let out a playfully devious laugh as she approached me, threw her arms around the back of my neck, and warmly peered into my eyes.
“From what the girls said, you rather enjoyed it too” she depravedly said. Her eyes burned through me with desire.
She then began gently exploring my backside with her clawed hands; caressing me tenderly while softly but lewdly moaning.
“Sorry, no cake for you, Missy. You’re not one of the judges” I said, bursting her bubble as my childish payback.
“And the first prize of the Sexiest Man of Gamberton Contest is…” the Hakutaku on stage announced, letting the suspense linger.
I can’t speak for the other nine schmucks standing on the stage with me, but I felt like complete jackass. After I was practically thrown onto the stage, they expected me to showboat for the audience of Succubi and Demons. I could practically hear them shouting “Take it off”. Not really my style.
Now I know what those poor girls working in a strip club felt like.
“‘Veina’s Man of Mystery’!”. And the crowd goes wild. Great. Veina not only gave me a stupid stage name, but also felt the need to include herself in the title. Adorable. My agent was a Demon. Sounds about right.
The Hakutaku put a medal around my neck as Veina flew onto the stage, grabbed my hand, and began showboating for the hormonal hoard in her usual cool-headed manner. Dammit, I felt like one of those trophy wives.
I could see my three molesters standing in ovation. I gave them a dirty look as if to say “this is your fault”.
Then, the Hakutaku gave me my first place prize: a large vile of red liquid. Okay… I’ll ask have to ask Veina what it was later, and then decide if all this was worth it.
Big deal. I wouldn’t be surprised if Veina pulled some strings in this little victory. I mean, I couldn’t even get a date for a high school dance, much less win “The Demon Lord’s Next Top Pimp”.
Just get me out of here already.
After that scene, we managed to get out of there before the orgy commenced in full and began hunting for a good stiff drink. I would have even taken that Dunkin’ Donuts nasty-ass coffee slushy that failed spectacularly back on Earth. Anything, as along as it was strong.
We stopped at an Oni stand where I got a large glass of wine. No beer allowed, so this was the next best thing. I also decided to chow down on some ribs. Yeah I was pretty famished.
We sat at a table near a bonfire with an Apsara dancing erotically in front of it. A little ‘entertainment’ with that dinner, sir? Veina hadn’t ordered anything. But if the amorous look she gave me as I ate was anything to go by, it was only because she already had what she really wanted to feed on. Gulp.
“By the way, what is this stuff? Kool-Aid?” I asked, finishing my ribs and handing her the vile of mysterious red liquid.
“I’m glad you asked. This potion happens to be quite a valuable and expensive item” she said, playfully rotating the vile in her hand.
“Nice. What flavor is it?”
“It isn’t just for drinking, darling. This is an actual shapeshifting potion. Not merely an illusion spell like I have. But it can temporarily change you into the species of your choice”
“Wonderful. Now you can turn into a Greenworm whenever you want to” I joked.
“That or any other species you wish for me to please you as…” she sighed as she looked longingly at me.
“Hold it! That’s why you entered me into that embarrassing sexscabade? To win a glorified fetish toy!?” I snapped. As irritated as I was, it made sense. I mean, it wasn’t like I was going to walk out of perverted contest like that with a one-million dollar check. But at least this potion, unlike the check, was tax-free.
“Well they are quite rare…” she chuckled.
I let out a resentful groan
“Tell me honestly. Are all mamano born this way, or do you just never get past the puberty stage?” I hissed.
“It varies for each species but it certainly comes naturally to all mamano, my love” she said with a prideful yet honest tone in her voice.
“Seems pretty selfish and stupid, if you ask me. Don’t you think there’s more important things in life than ‘riding’ that jolly train?”
“Well, bringing sexual satisfaction to a man is more important to mamano than just pleasure. It just so happens that a man’s spirit energy comes from his seed. Their delicious spirit energy supplies us with the power we need to survive. So pleasuring our man is essential for us”.
“Ah-ha!” I shouted, cutting her off. I think she just fucked up.
“What!?” she said, taken aback by my outburst.
“So that’s your game, is it? That’s always been your game! That’s why you’re always trying to get into a man’s pants; to suck the life out of them! Glad to hear you finally admit it, Horn Head!”
“I don’t understand”.
“Okay let me spell it out. You need us! That’s all we are to you. Just cattle in need of milking, right? We’re just a food source to you. You drain a guy dry and leave him like a prostitute with a 100 dollar bill tucked into their cleavage after a night’s work”
That should just about demolish the whole “true love” argument. And I owe it all to you, Veina.
“Please let me explain” she said, cutting me off. “It’s true that for us Demons, a man’s spirit energy and sexual activity does give us power, but it is also how we live. It keeps up our health physically and mentally. And not just us, but all mamano. You may say it’s similar as to how you live off of food and water”
“Exactly. Like I said, we’re just a food source to you” I growled back.
“Well, what about you and your parents?”
“I’m sorry, what?” I said, confused by her change of course.
“When you were a child, you had to rely on your parents to provide food for you, right? You wouldn’t call them a food source. You were by no means a leech, but you were dependent upon them to accommodate you. They didn’t do it against their will; they did it out of love”
I simply scuffed at her reasonable albeit suspicious logic.
“And don’t forget. It works both ways, my love. You provide us with your spirit energy, and we provide you with pleasures you can’t even begin to imagine” she said as she began rubbing my hand affectionately. “We can offer you even more than that if you let us…”
I guess that made sense, in a strange way, but it did seem like a convenient excuse. And it still relied on my faith in her. Sorry but that supply still is far below the demand.
“We all gotta work for our meals. Big deal”.
“It is a big deal to us”.
“Yeah, well I suppose if I got my taste buds all prepped for dessert from Dairy Queen’s Frozen Kingdom, then I’d be pissed if that bitch didn’t deliver my ice cream sundae. But that doesn’t mean you get to spread around STDs. The whole ‘Make love, not war’ shit went out of fashion in the 1960s, man. Kinda hard to believe you’re in love with someone when all you really want is a drink”
“But I did all this today just for you. I wanted to bring some joy to my lover”
“Veina, I appreciate you paying for my ticket here today, but when I agreed to come, it was just for some kicks. I never said I loved you. And I sure as hell didn’t come here so you could get a ride on me instead of the attractions. No fucking way are you gonna brainwash me into a zombie”
“Let’s not talk about this now. Please?”
“No, let’s talk about it!” I stammered, deciding to press the issue this time. “What real plans do you have in store for me? Make me your servant through a slow mindbreak or by strapping on the chains right now?”
“You still believe that I mean you harm?” she said slightly hurt by my words.
“Harm by another name. Ultimately, I, like every other guy around here, am expendable. If we’re used up or dead, you could just pick up another piece of beef fresh off of the assembly line. It’s okay. Someone of your ‘status’ can just have me replaced with any of those other nine guys from the contest”
She gripped my hand tightly, interrupting me.
“Don’t say things like that!” she exclaimed, a look of fear on her face. “Listen to me, Jason. I would never, ever harm you. You are the most important thing in the world to me. I don’t even like to think about losing you. That’s not an option” she said with more sincerity than I expected.
“Yeah right. Now that I know that my southern ‘swim team’ gives you power”
“Jason… if I just wanted you for power, I’ve had every opportunity to take it from you by force. But I didn’t”
“If you want to break someone’s mind, you do it to them slowly, not by shoving a jackhammer up their nose. I know you’re into that kind of stuff. Call it a fetish. Makes the guy into a better sex slave for you to toy with”
“Have you seen any mamano here enslaving men? Every couple at this festival wants to be here with the one they love” she said as the glow in her eyes seem to diminish. “If it was just a trap to harvest men, it would have been sprang a long time ago. But no. We’re not savages with no emotions. Spirit energy is at it’s purest and strongest when it is provided through a man’s affection”
“Well where I come from, a Succubus drains the life out of any poor sap who’s stupid enough to put his guard down and his dick up. In other words, they’re the nicest killers you’ll ever see” I fired back.
A disheartened expression began to form on her face.
“I’m so sorry for you. It must be lonely where you come from” she sighed sympathetically.
“It can be. It can also be worse. Makes trust a hard thing to come by”
“My feelings for you are genuine. All humans here feel that way at first. I understand that it can take longer for humans’ love to grow deep. But we mamano have a stronger sense for these kinds of feelings. It depends on the individual, but we achieve true love much faster than humans do which can make it frustrating for us to wait. Some mamano find it impossible to wait and desire to express that love to their husband right away, even if it seems aggressive at first. But it’s only done to bring bliss to themselves and the one they love” she said as she traced circles on my palm with her index finger. “Humans sometimes need assistance discovering their true feelings and mamano love to affectionately help them find those true feelings. Be honest, don’t you wish everyone could fall in love instantly?” she said dreamily.
As cliched as it was, it wouldn’t be too bad if everyone in this world just loved each other so easily. But I learned not to go through life with rose-tinted glasses on. Real world, real problems, real shit.
“Life isn’t filled with lollipops and lemonade rivers, Big Ears. I wish a lot of things were true. But life doesn’t take friend requests. It’s full of people that love only themselves; no room for a significant other” I said, cynically cocking an eyebrow.
“Yes, it’s true. Love isn’t always guaranteed in this world. That’s exactly what the Demon Lord is trying to change” she murmured smugly.
“Yeah, by wiping out the entire human race” I sneered, ready to unload some more emotional baggage.
“Of course not. Where did you get such an idea?”
“Call it clairvoyance. But turning all women into monsters and all men into Incubi? I’d call that a mass extinction event. More subtle but just as effective as that meteorite sucker-punching the Earth. I’m not saying that those closed-minded fuckers in the Order are any better. They just don’t like that they can’t rule the entire world. So just exterminate whatever they can’t control”
“That’s just it. She wants to stop all the killing and end this war once and for all. Bring love and peace to everyone”
“At what fucking cost? An entire race? Just to satisfy the childish fantasies of her and all of the other monsters that spilled from her loins?”
“I told you, we’re not savages. The Demon Lord is not looking to rule anyone through tyranny”
“Like what happened in Lescatie? Why don’t you tell me about that. Tell me how those people had to be forced to convert. I’m sure you have some inside info”
I’d caught her off guard. That’s a first.
“Oh so you know about that”
“Damn right I do” I boasted, reveling in my little surprise.
“Lescatie was an important step for the Demon Lord. It was done with the best of intentions”
“Sure it was. An important step in spreading her influence even further. ‘Best of intentions’ my ass. There’s no end to her greed. So Druella changed an entire nation to her mama’s liking without the consent of anyone living there. Sounds a little like rape to me. You talk of love. Bullshit, it’s love. I don’t even think mamano are capable of those kinds of feelings”
“That’s… hurtful, Jason. How cou-“
“No, fuck you! Fuck the Demon Lord! Fuck the Order! Fuck all of you!” I yelled.
The realization of what I just said hit both of us at the same time. I was a jerk toward Veina, that much was true. Yet no matter how much of a jerk I was, Veina always had a lusty smile or at least an affectionate one to go along with her cool, confident, and sultry demeanor. But I had never said anything that harsh to her before. I think it had hit harder than I thought it would.
Veina’s face was that of mild shock. I was pretty sure I even saw her lip slightly begin to quiver. I’d never seen her like that; she looked genuinely hurt. Vulnerable. Instantly, I began to regret what I said. I really didn’t expect her to react like this. Why did I suddenly have so much emotion other than my usual snidey ways. What brought on this much resentment to lash out like that?
“Look, Veina. It’s-” I started speaking in a more gentle tone before I was cut off by the sound of an explosion.
I could see smoke building up near the front gate. A loud horn went off from a tower not too far from the gate.
“Oh no” Veina said, standing up, now on full alert.
“What is it?” I asked.
“The Order…” she said. “Hurry. Follow me”
The next thing I knew, I was obediently trailing behind Veina, moving away from the gate. Lots of other mamano and their loved ones were moving in the same direction. Before long, I found myself in a large plaza-like area. I was grouped with several other men who were all holding their, what I assume to be, daughters. They tried their best to keep their litter calm… like a real parent. Not as many mothers around. Guess the more badass mothers were heading out for combat.
“Just stay her, Jason. I need to go now and handle this situation. I’ll return to you as soon as I can” Veina said putting her hand on my cheek.
“Hey, if there’s going to be and Order ass-kicking contest, that’s one event I actually want to compete in” I insisted.
“No! It’s too risky. You’ll be safe here, my love. I have to go now”. With that, Veina spread her wings and took to the sky.
Just then, a group of Witches in the center of the plaza all raised their glowing staffs together and conjured up a magic barrier or fence, encasing us all inside. I guess this was our makeshift bomb shelter, only with no barrier covering the top.
About a half an hour had passed. I could see the majority of fighting happening in the distance. Swords, shields, axes, hammers, magical spells, and explosions all colliding in a battle between mamano and members of the Order. There were also a few scattered battles going on around different parts of the festival.
I felt like kind of a pansey being stuck with the defenseless lot that needed protection. I knew I could handle myself. But on the other hand, my survival instincts told me this was best, and was better than running around out there and ending up in a hospital or a grave the next day.
Suddenly, something caught my eye off to the side, some distance away from the primary battleground. Three heavily armored knights, accompanied by two mages were in the middle of what looked like a lynching party. One mage was using a spell to pin down a screaming Queen Hornet. Not too far off, some knights were dragging off a snooty-looking fella wearing some kind of fancy, jewel-incrested robe. Real classy way to do away with someone in a classy outfit.
Not now Uncle Ben. Now’s not the time for a talk about responsibility.
Even if that were true, the tree inside the magical barrier had a branch conveniently reaching over the top of the barrier. Someone could easily climb up that tree and jump over this magical forcefield to the other side.
Decisions, decisions, decisions.