Cut and Run Chapter 21
“Dragons, come in flavors.” A. Belushi.
It’s been an interesting few weeks since my Old Man came back from his vacation in the Dragon Realm. This is partly due to the ‘souvenir’ that he picked up on his trip: He became one of the rarest forms of Incubus in existence: A Cambion. Which, when you get down to it, is one of the more unusual sexually transmittable conditions a person can pick up on holiday. Naturally, it could’ve provided him Celebrity status, if he was into that sort of thing.
But, he never was into seeking fame for the sake of fame. He always preferred to do things unobtrusively, which is weird habit for a Marine. Marines aren’t exactly known for their stealthiness, after all.
For instance, he’d accept a contract to build something, then he’d do that job and do it well. Then and only then, would he accept other folks’ judgment about the quality of his work. More often than not, they spoke positively about it. He felt that celebrity that comes about from ‘honest hard work’ was the only kind of celebrity worth having.
So, what was the secret to his success?
“If I’m going to do something Allen, then I’m going to do the absolute best I can at it.” He’d often tell me.
“No half-measures.” He’d add as an afterthought.
Which I guess is one of the finer qualities of his, that managed to rub off onto me when I was growing up. Personally, I tried to be the best husband I could be, to my first wife and our kid. Now, I’m working on being a better one to Frazziss and Angelique, and inevitably the kids I’ve sired off of them.
That’s not to say his experience in becoming a Cambion didn’t change him. It did. But it did it in a good way. If anything else, he became,… oh I don’t know,…he became,….looser.
Within a couple of days of his arrival, I realized that he was far less uptight than he’d been before he went on his fuckabout. What’s a fuckabout? It’s the Mamono version of the Aussie walkabout. They get more than itchy feet.
Let me give you an example. During those months in which he’d been gone, I had his rig taken back down to Merced, to await his inevitable reappearance. When did he show up, I fully expected him to pitch a major fit about the inconvenience of not having it on hand.
Do you know what? After I explained to him what I’d done. He didn’t. For the first time in his life that I could remember, he just shrugged it off. He didn’t gripe or even complain so much as once, about the inconvenience of it all.
“Don’t worry about it Allen! I’ll make do. I’ll just give Dain a call; and he and I can work something out, later.” He said, much to my relief.
But, since he didn’t have his rig for that medical appointment I made for him, we were left in a quandary. No rig = no ride. The only option available to us then, was having him ride me ‘piggy-back’.
Or would that be ‘draggy-back’? Whatever.
I kinda expected him to have at least some kind of problem with the trip, but he had no complaints. At least on the way over.
On the way back it was a different matter.
No sooner than I found a thermal and I was able to start soaring up over the Valley, than he starts up with some bellyaching. My first clue about it, was when he leaned forward and said something.
“Are we there yet?” he half-shouts into my scaly ear. I’m like- ‘WTF’?
“What?!” I yelled, after turning and giving him a look.
“Are we there yet?” he demanded once more.
“No!” I snapped back at him, “we just got started, we’re still over Yosemite Valley, it’s gonna take at least another ten to fifteen minutes before we’re even close to getting to the Cave!” I yelled at him over the sound of the wind. Naturally, I was wondering where the fuck THAT question had come from.
He didn’t say anything by way of reply, instead he just relaxed and started looking around at the passing scenery. I relaxed too.
Then, a couple of minutes later.
“Are we there yet?” he asks me again. This time, we’re only a couple of miles north of the valley.
“NO! We’re not there yet! Why do you ask?” I demanded. ‘Maou this shit’s getting old!’ I groused to myself, while not letting him see that dirty look that crossed my face.
“Everything looks the same up here, I just wanted to know when we’re there.” He replied, in the most innocent of sounding voices. That alone, should have given me a clue.
“I’ll let you know when we’re getting close, ok?” I answered absently, while trying to concentrate on my flying, maintaining my heading, and not ‘accidentally’ dropping my Old Man off of my back; tempting though it was right then. He didn’t reply, he just leaned back again.
‘Sheesh!’ I griped. We were good for a few more wingstrokes and then…he leaned forward again and began to speak. I cut him off.
“NO! We Are STILL Not There Yet! I enunciated clearly enough for him to hear.
“But that’s now what I was gonna ask.” He replied in the most peevish of voices. I sighed.
“So, what were you going to ask?”
“Is there a bathroom nearby? Because I really gotta go!” he replied. I had to take in a couple of calming breaths before replying.
“If you gotta ‘go’, then why didn’t you think of that before we,…” I began and then stopped in sudden realization.
I stared straight ahead through half-lidded eyes for a couple of seconds, and then I arched my neck back around and looked at him.
Sure enough, he was looking back at me with a shit eating grin.
“What the fuck Old Man? What’s all this shit about?” I demanded. He grinned at me for several longs seconds, before he replied with one word.
“Payback.” I sighed in exasperation, when I finally realized what it was that he’d been getting at. I couldn’t help it, I grinned back.
“So, how’s it feel?” I asked.
“Wonderful.” He replied, and then he began to laugh. After a second or two more, I joined him. What can I say? It was just so fucking cool then.
In retrospect, I can’t blame him in the least for pulling that prank. I’ve no idea how many times I pulled that same shit on him when I was a kid. I had asked him those very questions, countless times, on every one of those road trips that he’d taken me on. Now, it was his turn.
The news that he might’ve become a Daddy again, knocked both him and I for a loop. I have to admit, that I just blanked the thought of it from my mind for the longest time. I shouldn’t have.
In my defense, I was more concerned then with his state of mind. I felt that since he was still a little off-kilter after his ‘ordeal’, that I offered to have him stay at the Cave until he got his feet set on the ground. To my surprise, he readily agreed.
Honestly, I fully expected sparks to be flying really quick like; what with his life-long acerbic personality, clashing with a Cave full of Dragons. I thought it’d be like matter and anti-matter.
It turned out that I was wrong. I can’t tell you how happy I was to be wrong about that. To my complete and utter astonishment, he fit right in with us. He got along great with Frazziss, he always deferred to her authority as ‘Queen of the Cave’. He got along nicely with Angelique, and he got along REALLY SWELL with Pirin.
I think that’s because he was true to his stated desire of settling down with just one Dragon. To absolutely no one’s surprise, he didn’t need his own set of rooms. He just started to spend every one of his nights with her. Well, she didn’t have any objections or complaints about that arrangement.
Though we did hear her making a lot of high pitched moaning and groaning about it. Everyone knew how well she was feeling, by the way those sounds kept echoing through the Cave’s hallways, all of the time. But, they were of the good variety.
No, she didn’t have any complaints, not really. But after about a week, she and I ended up having: The Talk.
“If there ever comes a day when we can’t be together, keep me in
your heart; I’ll be there forever.’ – W. Pooh
“Uhhhmmm, Loknarr?” she asked me all tremulous, when I stomped into the kitchen for breakfast one morning. I was absent mindedly pouring myself a cuppa hot broth then.
I had a clue something was up, when I realized that she’d gotten up earlier than normal to work on making omelettes for everyone. There were at least seven egg shell cartons lying about, and a whole pile of freshly shredded cheese.
“There was something important, that I,…uhhh,… wanted to talk to you about.” She mentioned suddenly, while she was clenching and unclenching her wings.
“Yes Pirin?” I replied innocently, looking back at her over the rim of my broth-cup, pretending to not understand what she was going on about. Oh, I could tell that she was nervous, because her clenching her wings like that, indicated she was afeared of something.
“Uuuuhhhhmmmm.” She hummed as she glanced over at me, seemingly not paying attention to the eggs in front of her. Taking a quick sniff, I noticed then that she should hurry up, if she wanted to avoid them burning them, that is.
“I wanted to,….uhhhh, I mean.” She murmured for a bit, then she stopped and sighed, while not looking at either me or the pan in front of her.
“I mean, what I wanted to say was…” she started up again, shifting from foot to foot with her tail lashing slightly behind her. All during this, she was staring off into the distance, instead of at the eggs that were starting to smoke.
‘Ah crap.’ I thought, ‘I better do something.’ I decided. Yeah, I knew exactly what she was about.
So, I let her off the hook. I went up to her and put my paws on her shoulders. Which made her give out a small ‘yelp’, and tense up. Then, I gently turned her around so that I could look her in her eyes.
“Pirin.” I stated clearly, as she looked back at me with a pair of nervously blinking, vertically slitted Dragon eyes.
“I think that you and my Dad, would make a wonderful couple!” I replied with a heartfelt smile. I can tell you, THAT caught her by surprise!
“Really?!” she gasped, with her mouth left hanging open. I nodded, which made her eyes start to fill with tears.
“So you don’t mind if you and I stop,…?” she began. My smile got even wider then.
“I don’t mind at all.” I replied honestly. She then leaped into my arms and gave me the biggest hug, that lasted for the longest while!
“Thank you!” she sniffled into my ear, during the middle of that hug.
“You’re quite welcome.” I replied, while I also surreptitiously nudged the pan off of the burner with my tail tip, so as to save my breakfast. She was so overjoyed with the ease of our ‘break-up’, that she didn’t notice my having done so later.
Me? I was doubly glad, because I felt that Pirin deserved her own dude. But also because I can’t stand the taste of burnt eggs. Which is kinda weird, since I’m a Dragon now. You’d think that Dragons eating burned stuff would be a given. But not for me man, nah.
After that, Dad and Pirin were pretty much joined at the,….*ahem*,….hip. Well not really, but I think you can guess where actually.
I have to admit it’s been fun watching the two of them blossom in their relationship.
Yet, it also got kinda strange too. For some reason I kept having intrusive thoughts concerning that old Ray Steven’s song: “I’m My Own Grandpa.”
Why? That’s because, when Dad and Pirin get officially hitched, then that would make her, my old lover, my Step-Mom. Then, when they have themselves some kids, that would make them,…
And I just realized, that I just don’t wanna go any further with that train of thought.
It makes my brain hurt.
“When a Father gives to his Son, both laugh. When a Son gives to his Father
both cry.” – Unknown
True to his work-ethic, when Dad wasn’t donating his already copious supply of Spirit Energy to Pirin, he was always helping out around the place. Which was great. Because a Dragon’s cave doesn’t keep itself clean by itself, don’t ya know?
Granted, at first I felt that there wasn’t much he could do, by way of actual structural cave upkeep. Months ago, he had shown that he could do small stuff, like shape a bowl back into a plate. But from what he’d told me, it left him wiped for days afterward. I thought that he wasn’t capable of doing much more in that regard. It turns out I was wrong.
It was when I was down at the edge of the reservoir one evening, that I learned it. It’d always been a bit of a quick flap down to the water’s edge for me.
For a while I’d been thinking about trying to try and find the spare time, to ‘mold’ a proper set of stairs start up near the Cave entrance. Then, they’d be leading all the way down to my favored spot. What I’d done previous, was just scoop out a number of ‘paw-holds’ so that I could just simply climb down, if need be.
Why did I go down there? Because that spot was just perfect for skipping stones. It was a good place, because for some unknown reason the waters were almost always still there. Flat as a pancake, the saying goes. Whenever I had some free time, I’d grab a rock or two, and just flatten them out into the perfect shape for skipping, and then just go to town. I was always coming up with another idea to improve the shape.
Unfortunately, none of my women cared to join me. All this, despite my urging them to. You know, ‘together-time’.
Both Frazziss and Pirin, invariably just looked at each other and rolled their eyes every time I asked them. And Angelique? She didn’t care to get that close to such a big expanse of water. I couldn’t blame her, considering that she had in fact drowned once.
But dad? He joined me there lickity split, along with a six-pack of root-beer.
“So, what are you doing again here Allen?” he asked me once he climbed himself down yonder.
“Skipping stones.” I replied with a smile, as I picked up a rock and then began to flatten it. When my Dad saw that, he gave off a reaction that I didn’t expect.
He paled, and then he started panting and shivering.
“Dad? Are you Ok?” I asked him when I noticed. At first, he just nodded his head, while looking fearfully at the now somewhat plastic rock I held in my hands/paws. After a second or two, he looked up at me in the eyes, and then shook his head in negation.
“Dad. What’s wrong?” I asked him softly in concern, as I put that rock down AWAY from him, as he turned from me and looked out at the reservoir water. I didn’t say anything more, or try to touch him to get his attention. I knew enough then, to recognize somewhat, a person’s PTSD reactions. And he was having plenty right then.
So, I just waited patiently for him to tell me if he needed anything. I even held off on reaching out with my Ki-sense. As it was the kind of thing he’d probably sense as an intrusion.
After a few minutes he got his composure, and then he sat down. When he did, he patted one of the rocks next to him, indicating to me that he wanted me to sit next to him.
I did so, silently. For the longest while, we both kept quiet staring out over the expanse of the reservoir. It was kinda beautiful then.
“I’m sorry you had to see that Allen.” He began finally. I didn’t say anything, I just glanced at him softly, to let him know that I’d heard him. He then held out his hands.
“Give me that rock!” he said harshly. Confused at first, I did so. When he took it, his own hands started to shake. Looking up at his face, I could see him frowning then. The longer I looked, the deeper that frown got. Then, I could see that he was crying a load of tears, they were dripping like a waterfall they were so fast.
“Dad?” I asked, he ignored me.
Then he clenched his eyes shut, and then he let out a small half-suppressed scream that made my ears quiver. When he did that, he gripped that rock in his hands so fiercely that I could sense his power with my Ki-sense. He made it ‘squiggle’. I can’t put it better than that. And then, was when he did something that surprised the shit out of me.
His fingers sunk INTO that rock like it was made of soft clay. Then he opened his eyes and stared at what he’d done, while panting softly. I was staring too. It was so unexpected to me. I was about to say something else.
But that, was when he let out another scream and then he pulled that rock apart like it was just so much taffy. It came apart at the last with a small ‘snap’, and then he stood up and threw both parts far out into the water.
I couldn’t say anything then. How could I? My Old Man, had just demonstrated to me that one ability, on a level of ability that only Male Dragons were supposed to have: Stone-Molding with ease. Then it hit me, he was not only descended from Dragons, he was now a Dragon’s Incubus to boot. The change must’ve given him a boost in more than just sexual stamina.
We matched eyes then.
“How long?” I asked. He stared back at me for several long seconds and then he replied. What he said then surprised me even more.
“Ever since I was a boy. About eight or nine, I think.” he replied hoarsely, tears still streaming.
“How come you never did it so strongly before? You seemed to have the basic ability, down pat back then months ago.”
“Old habits, Allen. I chose to suppress it” He swallowed.
“But why do that?” I asked, he gave me a humorless smile.
“Allen, do you really have to ask?” he replied, while shaking his head slightly. I was about to say something more, then I realized.
“The Order.” I replied in a whisper, feeling a chill. He just nodded once and then heaved a major sigh, seeming to collapse.
“Like I told you before,” he began, “I’d learned to mold-stone when I was a boy. But, what I didn’t tell you was that I’d learned it by making skipping stones. Just like you were right now. In fact, I’d forgotten that I’d been able to do so in the first place. For some reason, the sight of you making a skipping stone out of that rock, triggered an old memory.” He remembered.
“When I realized what I was capable of back then, I showed it off to my friends. They thought it was cool.” He began with a mirthless smile. Then that smile evaporated, like so much dew in the summer sun.
“But that Order Priest in charge of us boys, was horrified.” He stated, with his eyes shut for several seconds, and then he continued.
“He said that I should stop doing that, because it was a Sin!”
“Damn.” I replied softly. I couldn’t think of anything else to say then. But, Dad was just getting started.
“A Sin! A SIN!” he shouted shrilly, panting again. Then he stopped. “He told me to stop doing those things. As they were a doorway that would lead me astray from the ‘Light of HER Truth’. His words.” He continued, and then he was silent for the longest while.
“So, what happened?” I asked, prompting him.
“At first I was defiant. I refused to obey him and kept making them. But, in the end, he got his way. Like so many of the other branches of the Order did.”
“How?” I asked. He then took in a deep breath and released it.
“He beat it out of me.” He said in a calm ‘matter-of-fact’ voice, not looking at me. I couldn’t reply, I was just too overwhelmed with the pain those six words inspired in me. He made another mirthless smile.
“Belts, leather-straps, and the like. You name it, he used it. I stopped defying him when he started going the whole nine-yards.”
“Nine-yards?” I asked, confused.
“It’s an old nautical term.” He explained. “For some reason, it refers to when blood starts to drip onto the deck.” He explained. “Even after I’d promised I would never do such a thing again, he kept beating me Allen.”
“Why?!” I cried in righteous anger then, as I felt my own breathing increase into an indignant panting. ‘Holy Fuck!’
“To teach me a lesson”, he said. “something about ‘blood atoning for sin’.”. He finished. I didn’t say anything then, I couldn’t. I was just too horrified to.
Then, dad reached down and looked over some of the rocks that were lying around us. Picking one up, he then concentrated on it and within a couple of seconds it started to ‘melt’. Slowly at first, but with increasing patience on his part, he then molded that stone into a half-way decent looking skipping stone.
After a long while of staring and giving that stone a half-smile, he then stood up and smartly cast that stone out into the water- just so.
It didn’t get far, maybe a half-dozen skips, but it was enough. Enough for him to yell in triumph: “FUCK YOU FATHER MULLINS!!!” he shouted then, loud enough for his voice to carry between the walls of the canyon we were in.
What did I do then? The only thing I could. I reached out, picked up another stone, molded it, and then skipped it out too. It went a few more skips than his. But just after I threw it, I yelled out in solidarity with my Old Man, “FUCK YOU FATHER MULLINS!”
My Dad’s eyes and mine met then in that moment. We nodded at each other silently and then we got started.
We were out there for hours, molding stones, skipping them, and shouting a fuck you to Father Mullins until our throats were sore. Sore, despite all of that root-beer we drank.
I can’t remember a more enjoyable memory of the time I’d ever spent with him, before, or since.
After that, we became a pretty good working team. We worked together on keeping up the Cave. I taught him a lot of the tips and tricks that I’d learned through trial and error. I had to admit, he was quite the enthusiastic student.
Why? Because he really was serious about making Pirin his woman. It turned out that what he wanted, was to build her a Cave. I can’t describe how ecstatic she was when he pitched the idea of it to her. I just wished he’d had chosen some place other than the dinner table to make it.
It was just another evening meal as a family, and I was politely listening to Frazziss as she was grousing about her day; something about having saved some damned fools from their own stupidity, again.
It wasn’t just the usual base-jumpers this time, but also some Tourists. Yeah, those kind of fools who think that Yosemite is another version of Disneyland, and not part of the few remaining parts of the wilderness. They’re the ones who are oh so shocked to discover, that such niceties as clean drinking water can’t be purchased around the next switchback.
I was listening attentively to her during her rant, when we all heard a squeal coming from Pirin. Everyone else’s head there, turned to look at Dad and her.
“Alonzo just said he wanted to make me my own Cave!” she shouted squeakily, as she hugged him close to her. “Isn’t that wonderful?!” she shrilled in a voice pitched high enough to make me wince. Dad had himself a beaming smile, glancing between me, Pirin, and the rest of us.
“Well done Dad!” I nodded and congratulated him, with a paws-thumb up. The next thing I knew, he and Pirin were kissing like Cheshires. It was nice to see, at first. But that kissing and hugging kept going, they also started getting steamier by the second.
The next all of us knew, she was kneeling in front of him and her head was bobbing and down enthusiastically, and he was moaning something fierce while holding onto her ears to direct her.
Now, personally, I’ve got no problem with having a dinner with a show. But, like any other person, the last thing I needed was to watch my Old Man getting down to business. At the Dinner table of all places.
“Hey get a room you two!” Angelique called out, as she reached out a paw and started stroking my leg. There’s always something about watching a pair of folks going at it, to inspire like-minded Mamono.
‘Ah crap!’ I silently complained, when I noticed Angelique leering at me. “Uhhh, would it be ok if I finished my meal first?” I asked her, plaintively. What can I say man, the meal was THAT good! Angelique just leaned into me and shook her head, as she reached out again and sunk another set of her claws into me.
“Ouch!” I groused, as I surrendered to her blandishments. After Angelique was done, Frazziss decided that it was her turn.
Wouldn’t you know it? By the time Frazziss was satisfied, someone had stolen the remainder of my food. Who? I had no idea. Dammit!
About a week after that meal, was when we had planned to finally have our ‘House-warming’ party. It was supposed to be just another small soiree for a small circle of friends from the Valley, nothing more.
Oh yeah, as promised I had sent off an invitation to Lady Mara. Remember her? She’s the Lilim in charge of the Demon Realm of (Southern) California, and the one who had approved my building a Cave in Hetch Hetchy Valley.
The Northern part of California, on the other paw, had started to finally make good on their centuries long threat to secede. The Lilim who would be in charge of that kingdom, would be having her hands full dealing with that load of goonies. Good Luck and good riddance!
Up until that meal, we’d not received any kind of reply from Lady Mara, so I just assumed that she wasn’t interested, and so we ended up deciding to make the party a small one.
But, fate decided it was time to play a trick on us.
The night of that Meal and a Show, a Mono-wind blew through the Park. Luckily, no one got hurt this time around. A couple of mornings later, I checked my cell phone and discovered that I had a message waiting. But when I played it, all that came out was a bunch of incomprehensible sobbing and wailing. After checking the number, I was surprised to see who it was that had called.
It was Teal of all folks. The Unicorn who was supposed to be getting married the day after the Cave’s house-warming party. I was intensely curious to figure out the contents of that message, so I went and took a flap out by her place.
“ALLEN!” she yelled when she spotted me as I landed. Once I’d been invited in to her place, she was nearly inconsolable while noisily sobbing into the shoulder of her intended, Reussel. He, was a Virgin with a capital “V”, despite the fact that he could’ve been a split image of a Lilim both nearly in form, and in hair color. I had to admit, he was rather nice looking, for a dude that is.
How nice looking?
There’d been a betting pool that gave some pretty decent odds, that he’d turn into an Alp on his wedding night. Yeah, that kind of nice looking.
“What’s up?” I asked him in concern, during those rare opportunities that Teal was able to inhale long enough to catch her breath. Maou, she was really freaked out.
“I know that we don’t know you all that well, Mr. Belushi, but we need your help!” the young and VIRGINAL (!) Reussel replied, as he hugged Teal and stroked her alabastrine mane in an effort to try and console her. I just nodded my head to get him to continue. He did.
“Do you remember that storm that came through a couple of days ago?” he asked.
“Yeah.” I replied.
“Apparently it blew down a number of trees, right onto the place that we’d hired for our wedding and reception.” He sighed, distraught.
“Oh Crap! I take it, that there isn’t any other place available?” I asked. He shook his head.
“No.” he said mournfully, while shaking his head. “What few were available were also snatched up before we could get to them.”
“Damn, that sucks.” I replied, annoyed by this turn of events. I noticed then that both Reussel and Teal seemed to be shocked by my cussing. “Sorry.” I apologized, Teal stopped sobbing long enough to nod me a forgiveness, and Reussel ceased his blushing.
‘Damn. He’s more Quivering than I thought.’ I mused inwardly.
“So!” I began, aloud. “Is there anything that I can do to help?” I automatically replied.
“Well”, Reussel began. To which, I mentally face-pawed. I had stepped right into that trap, didn’t I? “Actually, there is.”
“Go ahead and spit it out.” I replied, with just a hint of admiration in my voice. ‘Sneaky bastard.’ I judged.
“We were hoping you might be willing to let us hold our wedding and reception, at your Cave.” He whispered. That got my attention!
“Oh, is that all?” I asked, “That shouldn’t be a problem.”
“Normally, we wouldn’t have thought to even bother you, all things considered,…” he began. I held up a hand/paw to gently silence him. He did.
“Don’t worry about it.” I replied, “Yeah, we were planning on having a House-warming party anyways, so what’s the big whoop? Maybe we could just have one extended day of celebration?” I asked. He smiled at the idea.
“Uhmmm, we could probably have your wedding near the morning time, the reception soon after. That way, the both of you can go traipsing along on your honeymoon, before Frazziss’ and I’s House-warming party.” Teal and Reussel were all smiles with that arrangement.
Maou, I can tell you I was SO GLAD to get away from him. He reeked of virginity so much, that I’m surprised that he’d never been gang-raped by a band of Succubi before then.
Later on, I approached my women about the idea, and they both proved to be enthusiastic about it. As was Dad and Pirin.
If there is one thing women like, be they Mamono or not, it’s a wedding. So, in short order, we all arranged to just go ahead and combine the two parties into one Big-Party; volunteering the use of our Cave to act as an emergency fill-in for Teal’s Wedding and Reception. After all, that’s what friends do for each other, right?
Teal was much relieved as a result. All was well and good then.
But you know how life can be. It seldom likes to let you deal with just one problem at a time. On no. Life can be a sadistic bastard.
After that, including with the day to day upkeep my Dad started pitching in with the preparations for the Big Party. All without once being asked. It was then that I knew, that he definitely become part of the household. I have to admit that keeping the Cave up to par, required a lot of work. So naturally I was glad to have an extra set of paws. Uhhhh, hands.
The cool thing? By that time, he was showing quite the promise when it came to molding-stone. By way of demonstration, he showed off to me and Frazziss, what he’d been doing when he wasn’t porking Pirin.
He’d taken the time to make a set of stairs that led down the cliff-face from the fenced off area- in front of the Cave, all the way to my Skipping-Stone spot.
I felt that it was a fantastic looking one, nothing fancy, mostly utilitarian. But it worked, it even came with a raised banister. A smooth one, for just in case someone was silly enough to want to ride it.
“I don’t suppose you tried sliding down it?” I asked him that one evening he showed it to me and Frazziss. He shook his head, and gave me a strange look.
“Well,” I began as I went up a few steps and tossed a leg over it. “there’s only one way to test it!” as I began to let go.
“LOKNAR! STOP!” Frazziss yelled shrilly, her eyes blazing.
“What?” I demanded then,
“Don’t do that!” she yelled again, her wings twitching, Twitching, as if she were embarrassed about something.
“Because it’s undignified!” she replied.
“So who’s gonna watch? There’s no one else here!” I complained, waving a paw around in frustration.
“I’ll see you! So don’t!” she ordered me firmly. Dad and I just gave each other a look, and shrugged our shoulders in unison. She-who-must-be-obeyed ended up getting her way.
Later on, I woke up in the middle of that night and noticed that Frazziss was uncharacteristically absent. I went looking for her, and couldn’t find her anywhere inside. Following a hunch, I went outside.
Yep! Sure enough! There in the moonlight, I saw Frazziss sliding down that bannister, from the top all the way down to the water’s edge, laughing all the way. She managed to misjudge her speed a couple of times, and she plopped into the water, laughing even harder. I was laughing too, but for different reasons.
Thank Maou, for cell phones with video recording capabilities. The newer versions, like mine, also came with light enhancing features that allowed one to film folks at night. He-he-he!
There’s nothing like having a little bit of blackmail material to hold onto with a Dragon. Doubly so, if that Dragon is your wife. Maybe I’ll post it on the net, maybe I won’t. But I can tell you this, she will be most surprised if she ever discovers that video’s existence!
A couple of days before the Big Party, and guess what? A spanner got tossed into the works. I finally got a return RSVP from Lady Mara, via an Infernal Courier. That courier showed up, just as I had gotten done directing the wedding catering trucks, where to park outside my Cave.
The courier turned out to be either an Arch-Imp or one of those creepy-eyed, young Devils. I could never keep straight, what the difference is between those two Fem-Dems.
“Hi there!” Said the cutest, and yet somewhat alluring voice. I think my pancreas flinched at the sound of how sickeningly sweet that voice was. Turning around, the first thing I noticed was the demon.
“Uh, Hello?” I replied. At first glance, she appeared to be a youngish looking wiry Succubus floating knees bent, up in mid-air, with only a slight bobbing going on with her levitation. Of course, she was mostly not-dressed in a Velcro tank-top and mini-skirt. It was only when I noticed the platinum blondish-hair that half covered her horns, that I became suspicious.
‘Someone needs to bleach her hair roots.’ I remarked silently. Then I realized what kind of demon she was. ‘Arch-Imp!’ I thought, with my heart skipping a beat. The last thing I needed, was to garner the attention of one of those.
Standing alongside her, were a pair of serene looking gentlemen of the Far East variety, and a Mantis. Both of the Eastern males were each dressed professionally in a three-piece suit, and they were each carrying a small amount of hand luggage. While the Mantis was dressed in a maid’s outfit, of all things. I gave all three of these ‘not-inscrutables’ a brief, yet polite bow, which they returned without saying a word.
The Arch-Imp, after landing herself onto her high heel clad feet, curtsied to me with her wings fluttering slightly and then she spoke.
“Greetings Dragon Belushi! My name is Lucretia, and I come bearing you a message of Great Importance!” she stated, looking up at me with a dimple filled smile. She then handed me a wax-sealed rolled up parchment. Naturally, I immediately broke the seal and read it.
I’ll spare you the ‘thee’s and thou’s’ and all the rest of the flowery speech written in long hand. In short, it was written by none other than Lady Mara herself, announcing the fact that she would be arriving at some unnamed time on the very morning that Teal’s wedding would be. Along with a list of what she expected to have, arrangements-wise to protect her safety, and the safety of everyone else with her.
‘Oh CRAP!’ I thought as I read that, my heart sinking.
Yep, she intended to come along. But, she wasn’t going to be sneaking around, like the last time we’d seen her. She was going to attend in an official manner. Which meant of course, she wouldn’t be coming alone. Which is another way of saying: An Entourage. More mouths to feed, and host.
“Thank you very much for delivering this!” I told that saucy Arch-Imp, who kept licking her lips at me every time we made eye contact. It was unnerving to say the least.
“You can tell the Lady Mara, that I’ll have everything in readiness for her!” I replied, hoping that that little sex-pot of a Demon would take the hint, to make like a Tree and Leaf. She didn’t.
Instead, she oozed herself closer, while giving me the standard, ‘Arch-Imp Sweet and Innocent’ look that just about turned my stomach.
“Uhhhh, I’m gonna need to get started on all this, RIGHT NOW,” I emphasized, “if I’m to have everything ready for your Mistress.” I firmly told this Lolita like Hellspawn.
“Ooooh!” she whine/pouted prettily at me then. With her eyes blinking coquettishly.
“Couldn’t you at least send me off with a kiss?” she asked in a voice that sound oh so pure and chaste. But from the way she kept rubbing herself in certain spots with her hands, kinda contradicted that voice. It wouldn’t take a rocket-surgeon to figure out that any kiss from me, would result in my getting a lot of involuntary tongue action, like it or not. I sighed in exasperation.
“Do you really want a kiss?” I demanded. Her eyes lit up, while she grinned then.
“Oh Yes!” she declared happily, as she flounced her way in close, to do just that.
“Ok.” I replied, and then blew her a kiss.
“Hey!” she protested in frustrated outrage. Then, she tried to swoop in and snatch a kiss anyways. But it was too late then, as I’d already turned and was stomping my way into the Cave in a hasty retreat!
“Clit Tease!” she shouted, in a most un-childlike voice, then she ‘poofed’ haughtily out in a brimstone reeking teleport. The smell of which followed me well into the recesses of the Cave. I snorted.
It was only a couple of steps later, that I noticed that I wasn’t alone. Looking over my shoulder, I espied the two professionally dressed Far-Eastern gentlemen who had been accompanying that annoying little devil. But no sign of that Mantis.
“Uhhhh, how may I help you gentlemen?” I asked. They remained silent and stared back at me for the longest while. Finally, one of them indicated that I should read the RSVP again. When I did, I learned of a few more details.
“Mr. Belushi, I also humbly request that you allow my advance team of bodyguards, Mr. Kato and Mr. Hanzo, full access to your home. I kindly request that you treat them like you would me.”
“Oh!” I replied in dismay, then sighed. “You’re her bodyguards?” they nodded in unison.
“Please accept our humblest apologies for this intrusion.” Bowed Mr. Hanzo, as he began to explain.
“But, I am afraid that our arrival is both necessary and expected.” Bowed Mr. Kato, finishing for his companion.
“We are here, to insure that the safety of our Mistress is maintained to the highest of standards, both before and during her visit.” Mr. Hanzo piped up.
“Be assured that we are not here to be obnoxious, and that what we do, we do for the needs of our esteemed and most Honorable Lady Mara.” Kato injected.
“Please, do not hesitate to inform us, if there is anything we can do to help you with the arrangements for the Wedding and Party.” Hanzo spoke then.
“So, how best can I help you two?” I asked then. It turns out, that all they needed, was a spare room to set up. Set up what, I didn’t ask, nor care to know. I was able to get that pair squared away, lickety-split.
They turned out to be quite the asset during their stay. They were unfailingly polite at all times, and were more than eager to lend a hand with all of the chores. That evening I took them their requested drink of Sake, of which they gratefully accepted. My family all respected them and their privacy, and they seemed to do the same for us.
Best of all, they never once got underfoot. And now that I think about it. I can never recall ever actually seeing them enter or exit a room. They would just sort of ‘appear’, like they’d always been there waiting for me to notice them. I admit, that got kind of annoying. But I got used to it.
But then, that’s Shinobi for ya.
Remember my saying that Life can be a sadistic bastard?
A couple hours after Kato and Hanzo showed up, I got another unexpected guest. Reussel, Teal’s bridge-groom appeared on my doorstep, seeking Sanctuary. Apparently another emergency had cropped up.
Oh, imagine my surprise.
What happened this time, was that Reussel’s Best-Man had disappeared.
He, had a bad case of the same thing that Reussel had been afflicted with: Virginity. But, unlike Reussal, he wasn’t interested in hooking up with a Unicorn or any other kind of Mamono.
Nah, he was strictly in the market for the rarest of the rare anymore: human women. So, apparently he had total confidence in the notion that that Order-Blessed Purity Ring of his, would protect him from Mamono. According to the rumor mill, he’d last been seen walking home on a route that would take him past a Red Oni bar. On Lady’s Night no less.
So, what’s the big whoop about a lack of a Best Man, you ask? His duties as Reussel’s Best-Man, included more than the usual for regular human weddings. He was also supposed to be there, to ensure that the Bridegroom didn’t get so much as a speck of corruption into him, prior the marriage.
Thus, the chief role for the Best Man in a Unicorn wedding is to act as a cunt-blocker. Why? That’s because, way too many jokers through the years have gotten creative when it comes to turning a Unicorn, into a Bicorn.
Take Travesty for instance. Even though it’d been years since it had happened, Teal was still paranoid about her older sister getting corrupted into one. For her, it was something that involved a few rubber bands, a liquid lunch, and a particle accelerator.
Naturally, Teal didn’t want to share that fate, and she had decided to drop out of the University’s physicist course. Thus, her family were doing everything they could, to keep the same from happening to her. Up to and including, hiring a Majin-guard to oversee Reussel, her intended.
Now, who did they find at the last second to do that?
Yeah, the recently graduated Dark-Mage. Talk about the Fox guarding the Hen-house. This shit just keeps getting better and better.
“Hi Mom! How’s it going?” I asked my Mom breathlessly, when she popped in. I was all huffing and puffing because of all of the last-minute arrangements taking place. Never mind the fact that the wedding wasn’t due to start for a least a couple of days.
It was: ‘Go here, do that, then go back there, why the hell didn’t you take care of this?’ one, or the other, of the women involved, would order me. Not just my women, but also Teal’s family as well.
Yeah, you get the idea of how much fun this was turning into, don’t you?
“No time for pleasantries, Allen my son!” she quickly air-kissed me by way for reply. “I’m strictly here on a professional basis!” she politely, but firmly, informed me. (Yay!)
“Just show me to Reussel, so that I can do my job!” she replied, I was all too happy to hand her off, as I had too much on my plate as it was. It was only after then, that I realized the potential problem.
‘Mom, Dark Mage, divorced. Check.’ After I had shown her to Reussel’s room, my brain decided to remind me of something important.
‘Dad, Incubus. Also divorced. Check.’ I then came to halting stop in the main hallway, and stood there blinking furiously in sudden realization.
“Under the same roof for several days.” I whispered hoarsely, as I face-pawed. “Ah fuck!”
But, I need not have worried. They were both professional and polite, when they had to be in each other’s presence. Not once did I hear a snipe, or a complaint from one, about the other, the entire time they were there. Cue a heavy sigh of relief from me.
Though occasionally, I think I caught one of them looking at the other, when the other wasn’t looking back; with a rather wistful and thoughtful looking frown on his or her face. But, it could’ve just been my imagination.
It was just as well Mom showed up when she had. For within an hour of her arrival, she managed to locate and forcefully remove an errant Nightmare stowaway from the Cave. That, was one sheepish looking Centaur, I can tell you!
“I’m sorry!” she apologized to us all, through the Baku-bridle Mom had slapped onto her. She apologized profusely to Reussel too.
‘Yeah, you’re sorry you got caught!’ I groused at her with an annoyed frown. ‘What the fuck is the allure in not letting Unicorns stay Uni-anyways?’ I complained to myself. Just that one act alone, demonstrated that my Mom had earned her fee, I felt.
So after that, the rest of us- Teal’s friends, got volunteered by my Mom to pitch in to make sure that he remained as ‘pure as driven snow’. At least before Teal had a chance to corrupt him into a ‘proper’ Unicorn-Incubus. As if I didn’t have enough shit to keep track of, for Maou’s sake.
Now, speaking of Corruption and the Incubus, I’d like to get back to the subject of my Dad.
I was also still having to wrap my mind over the notion of my Dad’s ‘Celebrity’ status. As I mentioned before, he got turned into a Cambion. Which is another way of saying, he became the “Ultimate Man-Slut” of Incubus-dom.
Now, take your regular Incubus. What’s he gonna be like when it comes to Women? And come, and come, and come! (Har!)
Now me, like so many other dudes; I was always under the impression that once a dude got himself corrupted into an Incubus, he’d be as happy as a pig in shit. That once he’s got himself a She-Orc to pork, that he’d be happy to be ‘Makin’ Bacon, with just that one single bit of ‘other white meat’. (Har!)
[Sorry, I couldn’t resist. What can I say? I’m just a natural Ham! Ba-dump-bum-pish!]
Why? Because, that one woman he’s matched with, is more often than not- a Succubus in one form or another. Which isn’t exactly a match made in Heaven, but that’s not the point. Incubus + Succubus = Happiness. You get the idea.
Now this has pretty much been the Great Maou’s recipe for success since Night one of her reign of power. When a dude gets himself corrupted into an Incubus, he tends to be satisfied with the one bed partner, and he lives ‘happily ever after.
Or, that’s the story we’ve all been sold.
It turns out, that real life ain’t like that. No, it’s different, way different. Because in reality, there are only an “X” number of males being born. Or at least up until recently. Nowadays, Incubi are being born left and right. In fact, there are now enough being born now to take up the slack created by the previous generations of Mamono, and that’s my point.
Before the Great Maou succeeded in her war against the Chief God, things were a bit more-dicey, gender-balance wise. Back in those days, there was a shit ton more Mamono-females, than there were snatched-men to keep them happy. The end result of which- a lot of guys who turned Incubus, had to put up with having more than one woman to sleep with every night.
Oh, darn the bad luck. Huh?
I’ve heard tales of Incubus-dudes having harems of almost a dozen different kind of Mamono, that he’d have to bang every day. A tough job no doubt, but hey someone had to do it, right?
But, if you ask any recently corrupted Incubus. Say, one that you might bump into on the street for instance. That if he’d like to have more than the just the one woman he’s banging right now, to join in? What would he say?
Every single one of them would tell you, that’s he perfectly satisfied with having just that one woman to bang. I mean after all, being an Incubus is some pretty hot shit, when you’ve got yourself a woman who is as like-minded as you, when it comes to the pillow pounding.
True, It’s fun to fantasize about being a sex-machine when you’re a horny human-male teenager. But, it’s a helluva lot more fun when you actually become one. That’s because your body can finally do everything you’ve ever fantasized about, sex-wise; than you could as a human.
I’ll let you in on a secret I’ve stumbled across. That dude who says he’s satisfied with that ‘one and only’?
He’s a liar.
Any Incubus who tells you that one woman is enough for him, is a fucking dirty ass liar. You know how I know that? Because I’m an Incubus myself. Granted I’m a Male Dragon, but I’m still an Incubus.
I’m still a guy. My eyes still rove on over to scope out a hot babe with a nice-looking ass, a great rack, or a sinuous tail. Do you remember that age-old saw that goes something like this: Are you a, Tits, Ass, or Legs Man?
Nowadays, a dude has got himself a few more options to appreciate when it comes to the fairer sex. He can be a ‘head-horns’ kind of guy, an exoskeleton guy, or he could be the kind of dude who appreciates the suppleness of wings: feathered, leathered, or what-have-you.
Yeah, all of that in addition to the regular attributes that women have had since the dawn of time.
If he’s a ‘leg-man’, chances are he’ll hook up with an Arachne. Me? I’m scaly wing kind of guy. Well, now that is. But, the point I was trying to get to, is this: An Incubus is, and always has been, a Sex-Demon. It doesn’t matter if he’s freshly corrupted, or if he’s the Great Maou’s husband. His eyes- are gonna rove. How do I know this?
Because in addition to myself, I’ve got a circle of Incubus friends, associates, and co-workers. All of whom come from a wide range of backgrounds, and all of whom highly appreciated the display my Mom put on for them during her time there. Enough so, to have them all ask me for her phone number afterwards.
It was the night before Teal’s wedding. So, to pass the time while our ladies were doing whatever the hell they do, when us guys aren’t underfoot; Me, my Dad, Jamal, Hanzo, Kato, Reussel, and a few other fellows, were all sitting around a table playing Dragon Poker. There to pass the tense hours before tomorrow’s wedding.
This night, was the one night it was most important to keep Reussel 100% pure. Even a certain detergent’s level of purity, wouldn’t be high enough of a standard to pass the Unicorn purity test.
What’s Dragon Poker, you ask? It’s a lot like regular human Poker, only it’s played with a Tarot deck. Which makes for one helluva lot more interesting game I’ll tell ya.
Looking down at the hand of cards I’d been dealt, I was unable to suppress the grimace that crossed my face. I held a deuce of pentacles, a trey of swords, a five of swords, an eight of staves, the Page of staves, the Queen of cups, and one of the Jokers. I could’ve used the Queen and the Joker, but since I’d gotten the queen inverted- I couldn’t use her as a wild card.
‘FUCK!’ I groused silently, ‘no pairs, no flushes, not even one of the major arcana. Dammit!’ I then looked up and around the table I’d been sitting at. Directly across from me was Jamal, he was still sorting out his hand that he’d gotten, but I could see that he had himself a smile growing on his face.
‘Shit!’ I fumed while looking down at my ever dwindling pile of chips, ‘he always seems to get himself a good hand!’ I mentally complained. Currently, he’d been banging Travesty so much, that he’d finally been corrupted into an Incubus. A Bi-corn’s Incubus, if you can believe such a thing.
Which meant, that both he and she had no problem with adding to their circle of lovers. Believe it or not, it turned out that Travesty was part of Teal’s wedding planners. Personally, I think her family had her do that, just so they could know where she was at all times.
Disgusted with Jamal’s inevitable good luck with the cards, I then turned my eyes over to the dude to the left of him, my old man. He was still sitting and slowly sorting his cards, like he always does when he’s playing. But, this time he had himself a shit eating grin on his face. Which made me wince when I saw the size of it. Figuring him, he probably had himself a Major Arcana Royal Flush.
To his left, was Carl. He was the dude who’d been banging Talia the Minotauros of late. He was a Fire-Jumper, just like Tallia’s first husband had been. If there were any other kind of classy dude who could easily handle a Minotauros, who wasn’t an Incubus beforehand, I’ve not heard of one.
Even though he was as tough as nails, he also had a reputation for being both Honorable, and Kind. Yeah, the two main kind of attributes that any kind of female worth marrying, are attracted to.
Then, there was Hanzo and Kato. Yeah, they were playing too. Wouldn’t you know it, they each were raking in the chips like madness. Bastards.
Sitting to the left of the Shinobi, was the big deal named Reussel. He wasn’t playing, he was just dealing out the cards as he was the only one everyone else trusted to do that.
Sitting to the left of him, was My Mom. Yeah, she was there in that poker game too, as Reussel’s bodyguard. She and he had been pretty much inseparable since she’d arrived, barring bathroom time of course. As always, she was constantly on alert for any corruption attempts on him.
But, not so on alert, that she didn’t mind putting on a jiggity display of her ‘assets’, one worthy of a strip club. Well, that Dark Mage magic is good for at least one thing, it seems!
I could see everyone else in that room, eyeballing her every time she ‘displayed’. Mom, naturally ate up that attention every chance she could.
‘Six Nip-Slips, eight partial or total Moons, four Basic-Instincts, and five Cleavage-Canyons, so far.’ I counted to myself, after the first hour of our game. I wasn’t sure, but I could’ve sworn that the table all of us guys were sitting underneath, had slowly risen upwards a few seconds after her last combo.
“Hey Mom!” I piped up at that point. “It’s not too late! If you like, I could Ded-Ex in a brass pole for you to use!” I snarked. She gave me such a glare then, as everyone else laughed. Reussel did too, but nervously, looking at her for a second and then elsewhere.
I pressed my luck despite her glower, by continuing on, “We could always set it up in the center of the table!” I suggested. But before she could say anything. Jamal distracted us all.
“Hey Alonzo!” demanded Jamal suddenly, of my Old Man; Alonzo being my father’s given name.
“Since you’ve banged so many Dragons like you claim; Do you have any insights on them?” he demanded.
“Insights? What do you mean by that, Jamal?” my Old Man asked, after placing his cards face down onto the table.
“I mean that since you’re a trailblazer when it comes to Fucking-Dragons, surely you’ve got some kind of wisdom, on how the rest of us can get lucky with some of them? I mean I’m only asking on behalf of a friend.” So sayeth Jamal. I noticed then, that Reussel was blushing furiously at Jamal’s pithy language.
‘Yeah, Uh-huh,’ I nodded with an amused smile. That’s Jamal for ya. He’s always trying to mark off another sexual conquest on his ‘Monster-Poke’ Scorecard. I was guessing that his motivation for asking, was that he’d been having difficulties filling in the Dragon section.
“Oh Ok! I see where you’re coming from on that now!” Dad’s voice shot back. “Well, the wisdom that I’ve gleaned from my experience with being with so many varieties of Dragon, is this.” Dad paused.
“Dragons, come in flavors.” He espoused. Right then, I gave out a hearty sigh, while shaking my head slightly at this bit of tomfoolery.
‘Ok, this is new.’ I thought to myself in amused exasperation, as I gently laid my own set of cards down. Then, I settled in for a good yarn as I observed Jamal gaping in surprise.
‘This is bound to be good!’ I smiled, as I craned one of my scaly ears in the direction of my Dad. It didn’t take long before he got a reply.
“Flavors?!” shouted Jamal, “Since when do Dragons come in flavors?” he demanded.
‘They do when you eat them out right!’ I silently answered.
“They do when you eat them out right!” Dad replied with a laugh, as he and all of the other Incubi at the table started laughing and complaining about his joke.
Me? I just grimaced slightly. That joke was considered old, even before Lilith the current Chief God, became the Great Maou.
But knowing my Old Man like I did, he’d probably run with that joke’s punchline in unexpected ways.
“Ah c’mon Alonzo, give!” shouted Carl then. “Do Dragons really do taste different, ‘down-there’?” he demanded.
“Well,” Dad replied, “as a matter of fact, they do.” He began sagely. With his reply, I could feel the tension of that area around that table, rise up far enough for me to smell it.
Right then, I saw what my Dad was doing, he was leaning back in his chair and stroking his chiseled jaw line with the fingers of one hand, all to ‘work the crowd’ as he likes to put it.
“In fact,” he continued, “it has been my experience in life that yes, they all do taste a little bit like chicken.” He replied to the sound of a number of Incubi drawing in their breaths in wondered surprise.
‘Bullshit!’ I thought with a half-smile, while looking away. ‘They most certainly DO NOT!’ I silently contradicted him. No, I didn’t say that out loud, there was no point in my trash-mouthing him and his story in front of him.
There are some things a dude should never do, whether he be a human male, a Dragon male, or any kind of Incubus. Chief amongst those things, is not interrupting another dude’s sexual exploits speech. Doing that, was not only bad form, but also bad manners.
Now, as to this speech that my Old man had been giving right then, it was something that he’d been yammering on about, ever since he’d come to live with us after his reappearance weeks ago.
Out of all of the Mamono women who listened to him; most just sat patiently by, and gave him a tolerant smile after he was done talking. Their incubuses, on the other paw, invariably hung on his every syllable. And like any other yarn, the time he spent ‘away with the Dragons’ got better with every telling.
“I remember that one day I spent an entire afternoon eating out a single Mist Continent Dragon, a ‘Lung’ type.” He began, and I noticed then that Hanzo and Kato had decided to turn their attention away from their card-hands, to give him their undivided attention.
“Why’d you do that?” piped up Reussel of all people, then. I could tell that he was honestly curious. Dad turned to him and smiled.
“Because she was so tasty, every time I ate her out, an hour later I was hungry for her again!” he shot back, to a chorus of groans and moans from every one there. Reussel, just sat there for a second with a dumb look on his face. Then, like a glacier, realization dawned on him at what Dad had been getting at. He blushed, and began guffawing he was so amused at having been had that way.
“Ok, Alonzo!” Jamal started up again. “What other kinds of flavors do they come in?” he asked with brilliant logic. Dad matched him.
“Some of them, also taste like Ice Cream.” He replied simply. I can tell you, THAT statement got everyone’s attention then. Mom included.
“Ice Cream?” she demanded skeptically, with a raised eyebrow.
“Yep!” he replied, as he turned and looked at me. Everyone else followed his gaze and looked at me too.
“What?!” I demanded, when I realized it.
“Well, is it true?” Carl asked. “Ice cream?” I rolled my eyes. But before I could answer, Dad came to my rescue.
“Yeah, in fact they taste like a pair of flavors from Jen and Berry’s line of Ice Cream!” he piped up.
“Dare I ask?” I demanded, not looking at him.
“Yep!” he chirped. “Snooty-Fruity and Hoity-Toity!” he shouted. Everyone laughed then, except me.
That’s because at that point, I was too busy banging my forehead onto the table in front of me.
‘Oh Maou! He’s a Dragon all right! He’s just missing his wings!’ I groused.
“Oh Dad, I sure hope Pirin didn’t hear you say that!” I shot back after lifting my head.
“Oh, Why’s that?” he asked me with a smirk on his face. I opened my mouth to answer, but he interrupted me.
“Who do you think told me that joke?” he asked sincerely. What could I say, I gawped at him.
“Really?” I asked, incredulous.
“Really.” He assured me. At which point, I started laughing. I had to. I couldn’t help but do it.
‘Just when you think you know someone!’ I thought as I laughed finally. What can I say, we were all laughing at that bit of tomfoolery. It was funny, because it hit so close to the bone.
It was about that time, that I noticed something odd. It was a woman’s giggle. Which, shouldn’t have been odd, because my Mom was there, chortling alongside everyone else. But, her laughter was coming from my right. The other woman’s was coming from my left, and a little behind. Turning my head, I peered over at the source, and stopped my snickering.
“Holy Shit!” I barked, which caused everyone else there to turn their heads at me, and then to where I was staring at in appalled surprise. Then they too stopped chuckling.
Because over there, sitting on a footstool was that lady who was laughing. She, was a six-and-a-half foot tall, statuesque platinum-blonde succubus of the first order. (Pardon the term).
“Oh my Maou!” I shouted in surprise, as I jumped to my feet, as did Hanzo and Kato. She then removed her hand from in front of her face, where she’d been covering her mouth all lady-like.
“Hello Boys!” Lady Mara replied to us all, with a sultry smile that promised much.