Cat Scratch Fever

I sigh as I walk up the steps to my aunt’s house. Two weeks. Two whole weeks I’ll be stuck here. Don’t get me wrong, I love my Aunt Mary and her house is beautiful, it’s that THING she keeps around I can’t stand. That damned cat of hers.

Cats and me, we don’t see eye to eye. My setting foot in the room is typically enough to put a cat in a pissy mood. I’ve learned not to question it and just keep my distance. That didn’t work with Mary’s cat though, Veri was outright combative. She took the beast in a few years ago, just in time for my first visit, and just in time to traumatize my delicate childhood psyche. Veri was only a kitten at the time, barely up to my knee, but that hadn’t given any pause to whatever spasm of the lower mind made her jump me like I owed her money the second I got through the door. She drove her claws into my leg and did her damndest to use the leverage they offered to climb within striking distance of my neck. Aunt Mary pulled her off, along with a few shreds of my good jeans, before she could perform the coup de gras. Veri was consigned to the garage for the rest of the afternoon. But we’d only dropped by for the afternoon that time; I doubt I can convince Mary to keep her pet locked up for two weeks.

Positioning my suitcase in front of myself as a shield, I give the doorbell a ring. The door opens a few moments later and deposits a double-armful of overly affectionate relative onto me.

“How’s my handsome nephew doing these days? I haven’t seen you in ages!”

He’s preparing himself for a lot of minor flesh wounds at the hands of your pet, Aunt Mary.

I scan over her shoulder for any sign of impending feline assault. Finding that the area is clear I return her greeting and do my best to keep up with the barrage of questions she has for me as she pulls me toward the kitchen.

“Have you eaten yet? I was just fixing myself some lunch.”

There’s always room for Aunt Mary’s cooking, so I request whatever she’s having. She smiles but promptly shoos me toward the living room and tells me to watch TV while I wait. Mary likes to cook, but hates having people underfoot in the kitchen.

I stumble to an abrupt halt when I reach the living room. The TV is already on, tuned to a documentary on ocean life. Stretched out on the ground in front of it, watching in silence, is the cat I’ve been dreading since I got in the car this morning. She’s grown a lot since I last saw her. I’d estimate that if she were to stand up straight she might come up to my chin. The orange and white-striped fur on her paws now extends up to her elbows and knees before giving way to the fair skin of an indoor cat. She suddenly turns to face me, slitted pupils set in powder-blue irises holding me in their steady gaze. The neck of the oversized T-shirt she wears hangs low enough that I don’t have to just assume that she’s grown out as well as up; She’s sporting the build of a mature cat, made for bearing and nursing litters of kittens.

Look her in the eye man. She’ll leave you alone if you can stare her down. Or is it the other way? If you look a cat in the eye too long it will take it as a challenge? Better look at the TV. She’s still staring at me, I can feel it. I sneak a glance back down at her. She hasn’t moved an inch. Maybe I should say something to her.

The tabby cat turns back to the TV before I can think of anything better than “nice kitty”. I let out a sigh of relief and inch over to the end of the couch farthest from her. The narrator of the show’s Bob Ross-esque voice and the dreamy piano score that accompanies are a potent narcotic, but I wouldn’t dare to fall asleep with cat-cujo in the room, so I try stay focused on the intricacies of anchovy reproduction and wait for Aunt Mary.

Fortunately for my sanity I don’t have to wait long; she comes bounding in just as they’re getting to how important anchovies are to the food web, the smell of grilled cheese and tomato soup preceding her.

“Veri making you watch one of her fish shows? I’m starting to think it would be cheaper to buy a goldfish and let her watch that!”

I try to give her the requisite amount of laughter for her joke before I turn to my food. Veri pads over to Aunt Mary as she sits down and retrieves what can only be a tuna sandwich from her plate. Instead of going back to watching TV however, she sits and faces me squarely as she nibbles at her lunch. I try to ignore her and focus on eating, but it proves impossible. My mind kicks into paranoia overdrive. Is she staring because I have something on my face? Is she going to claw me again? Does she even remember me? Did I remember my toothbrush?

My spoon clicks against an empty soup bowl and I realize I’ve polished off my entire lunch without tasting any of it. Aunt Mary takes my dishes back to the kitchen and I excuse myself to the guest room to unpack. Veri licks her lips slowly as she watches me leave. It’s going to be a loooong visit.

Aunt Mary is out for her weekly Bunco game tonight, meaning I can watch all the Troma films I want with the surround-sound set to max. It also means I’m on my own for dinner, which is why I’m standing in front of an open fridge, searching for something I can turn into dinner without a trip to the store. Roasted chicken is making itself known as the best option when I become aware of a presence behind me, followed shortly by a gentle nudging at my back. I spin around, knowing exactly who it must be.

Veri crept up on me while I was staring into the crisper. She recoils slightly as I turn to face her, then unhesitantly goes back to bumping her nose against me, sniffing curiously. I shrink away from her, right into the refrigerator.

“No. Bad cat. Go away.”

I try to shoo her away. She doesn’t move an inch, just sniffs my hand, stares at it a while, then goes back to examining the rest of me when she determines that it isn’t food. Food. Is she hungry? I look back into the fridge for something she might like. The obvious choice presents itself immediately: a carton of milk on the top shelf. The way her tail perks up when she sees me reaching for it tells me I made the right decision. I squeeze past the now horrifyingly clingy cat to the cupboard for a drinking glass and fill it to the brim. Veri keeps a close watch over every move I make, but doesn’t reach for the glass until I hand it to her.

Veri takes her glass to the counter and settles down to watch me as I prepare my dinner. If I look at her from a certain angle it almost looks like she’s smiling, but that can’t be. With the chicken in the oven, some vague task that desperately needs doing in another room calls out to me. I’m certain that if I were to turn around as I walk away I’d see her eyes fixing on me from over the rim of her glass.

I step out of the shower just as the clock strikes one a.m. and wriggle into my pajamas. I’m tired enough that I could have fallen asleep in there, but I force myself to brush my teeth and dry my hair too, knowing that I’ll sleep more comfortably if I do. With the taste of artificial mint still lingering in my mouth I grope my way down the dark hallway toward the guest room and the sweet relief of a warm bed. But of course, exhausted as I am, there’s no way it could be as easy as just flopping onto my mattress and going to sleep; no it’s always when you’re tired that they decide to throw a curveball at you.

“Oh hell no you stupid cat”

Veri is curled up in my bed, the pillow I’ve been sleeping on hugged to her chest, dozing softly. That simply won’t do. I can deal with having to tiptoe through any room she occupies, but this is ridiculous. I give her a nudge and whisper to her.

“Psssst. Wake up.”

She continues sleeping. I raise my voice a little louder.

“Hey. Wakey wakey.”

Nothing. I nudge her a bit harder.

“Wake up”

Nudge.

“Wake up!”

Shake.

“WAKE UP.”

Finally she stirs. I take a step back, outside of her immediate reach. She rises up to her knees, rubs a paw across her face sleepily, and fixes me with another stare.

“Nyaaaaa~”

“You annexed my bed and ignored me for the past 5 minutes and all you’ve got is ‘nyaa’?”

“Nyaa”

The intrusive cat flops herself back down on the mattress, snuggles up to my pillow, and goes back to sleep.

“Right, well fuck you too.”

I stalk over to the closet for a new pillow. Thinks she can just kick me out of bed does she? I’m going to get a good night’s rest even if it kills me.

“Scoot over”

I wedge myself into bed alongside Veri and close my eyes. Veri stirs again and I’m briefly filled with hope that she’s leaving before a sudden and significant weight on my chest squeezes it right out of me. I open my eyes to the sight of a familiar tabby cat looming over me, candle-bright eyes stark against her dark silhouette.

“Oh for god’s sake what do you want?”

She blinks slowly and wiggles her ears.

“You have a perfectly fine bed of your own, why don’t you go sleep in that?”

She cocks her head to the side.

“What am I even talking to you for? You’re a cat.”

Fed up, I raise my hand to try and push her off of me, but she surprises me by leaning forward eagerly and rubbing her head against my hand, ears flicking as they pass beneath my fingers. I pull my hand back, and she comes right with it, still nuzzling against me. I sit still and let her continue, surprised at how affectionate she’s acting. What surprises me more is how much I’m enjoying my first time petting a cat. For the first time I understand why someone would want one of these things in their house. I take a shot at being proactive and give one of her ears a little scratch. She starts purring. This is kind of fun. I slide my hand over and do the other ear. She slinks down to rest her head on my chest, the purrs emanating from her substantial chest augmented by a tangible sensation as she settles down on top of me. I place a hand on her back and stroke down to the base of her tail. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all. Still giving Veri a gentle pat here and there, I close my eyes and try to relax. Part of me is still nervous about being so close to her, but she’s pleasantly warm and her hair and fur are soft as silk, and it’s hard not to fall asleep.

Well, it would be, if I could get Veri to hold still. She starts to fidget as I pet her, jarring me awake each time. I go back to work on her ears in hopes of settling her down, but it actually makes things worse. She starts rocking back and forth over me, mewing breathlessly. I feel a warm, wet spot forming on one of my pant legs as she rubs against me, and the thought of spending the remaining pre-dawn hours cleaning urine out of my sheets throws me into a small panic. I push Veri off me as delicately as I can and examine my leg. There’s a dark patch on the thigh where Veri has smeared…something on me. Something thick and decidedly carnal smelling.

“Nyaaaaaaa”

Veri draws my attention with a desperate, whining mewl. She’s turned around, her head at the foot of the bed and her rear facing me. Her shirt slides up her back as she lifts her butt higher into the air, exposing her–

Oh my.

Her vulva is swollen and red, glistening under a coating of syrupy fluid. She inches closer and mewls again, wiggling her hips at me, tail pointed straight up. A musky scent fills my lungs with the next breath I take, the same scent that the mystery-liquid on my pajamas had. Good god, something I did has gotten her…hot under the collar. What am I supposed to do about this? Giving a cat a cold shower sounds like the kind of thing that would win me a darwin award. Perhaps I can just step out and let her take care of herself?

Veri lunges to intercept me before I can make it to the door. I jump and grimace as I feel her claws on my skin, but manage to keep from shouting. She tugs on me slightly, intent on keeping me from leaving. Ouch.

“Take it easy girl, take it easy”

I keep my voice as gentle as possible. Then I realize that I’m talking to a housepet again. Damn it.

Moving as delicately as possible, I take one of Veri’s paws and pry her claws out of my shirt. Perhaps realizing she’s done something wrong, Veri retracts her other paw by herself, then settles down on her knees. She mewls again, looking about as chastened as a cat can. A gentle probing of the site where her claws came to rest reveals that the skin is unbroken. Tender, but unbroken. Veri draws my attention back to her by nuzzling meekly against my leg. My heart sinks a little. She looks pathetic, and I don’t mean that in a mean way. I mean it as in her appearance elicits sympathy.

“It’s okay girl, I forgive you”

Another little scratch on the ear helps convince her that she’s not in trouble. Then it puts her back into cling-and-cuddle mode. Then she crosses the line into outright amorous. She lets me get in one last pat, then spins around and presents her ass to me again.

“Nyaa”

There’s no avoiding it any longer; She wants me to, err, “address” her problem. A perverse notion, to put it mildly, but what else can I do? Tell Aunt Mary that I accidentally gave the cat beaver fever? I can’t see that going over very well. At least this way, no one will know but me. I don’t actually have to shtoop her anyway; she’s not going to care if I just use my hand.

I crouch down behind Veri and take a closer look at her…area. She’s arranged about the same as a human, though I don’t think I’ve ever seen a human puff to this degree. Or get this wet. She’s actually dripping onto the floor now, and the air has gotten so thick with her need that I wouldn’t be surprised to see steam coming off of her. Taking a deep breath to steady my nerves, I gently press my finger against her entrance. Veri’s response is immediate and rather violent. She bucks her hips back and downward, engulfing my finger up to the knuckle in slippery heat. Soft ridges give a stuttering resistance as she forces herself down on my hand. Curious, I curl my finger and examine them as delicately as I can. Wow. They’re, well, distinct. She’s ribbed on the inside. I slip another finger into her and start sliding in and out of her, marveling at the yielding elasticity of her pussy. What would it be like to be inside her in a more intimate way? Suddenly these bottoms seem a lot more restrictive.

Veri interrupts my dirty fantasies with an impatient huff, followed by some clumsy thrusting against my hand. It doesn’t seem to yield the results she had in mind, because she continues huffing in frustration, wriggling spastically in an effort to please herself. A vain effort. A completely futile effort. I can’t get at her from the right angle with my hand, and she’s flat-out clumsy. And my arm will get tired soon. Yes. There’s clearly no way I can fingerbang my way out of this. Only the real thing will do. Clearly.

I hurriedly withdraw my fingers from her folds, tug my way out of my pajamas, and plant my hands on her amply-flared hips. Any lingering doubts I had about doing this evaporate as I get a handful of her marshmallow-soft flesh and feel my shaft come to rest between her voluminous buttocks. Veri realizes how close she is to getting what she was after in the first place and abruptly loses any trace of meekness. She leans against me, putting her weight on me until I’m on my back and she’s sitting comfortably in a reverse-cowgirl position. She wastes no time getting down to business, just plants her paws between my knees, hoists herself up and impales herself on me. My own gasp at the rippling sensation of being forced into her ridged womanhood so abruptly is drowned out by a bestial yelp from Veri, who begins sliding up and down on my dick with reckless abandon, unwilling to waste a moment after being denied for so long. The pleasure of her relentless pace is almost paralytic. The obscene sound of flesh clapping against flesh accompanies each of her downward thrusts. The soft ribs that line her vagina are angled inward ever so slightly, and tug on me mercilessly as she rises. Her walls clench greedily around me, so tight that her inner lips pull out around my shaft. The three-headed sensory assault of perverse sights, sounds, and sensations is almost too much; the icy tautness in my crotch is growing too fast. At this rate we’ll be finished before we’ve gotten started.

Teeth gritted to keep my head clear, I sit up and assert control of the situation with a firm push forward. Too firm. I’d intended to just put her off balance, enough to keep her from wringing me out so soon. Instead she pitches forward with a startled yip, landing tits-first on the carpet. I fear I’ve hurt her for a split second, but she lets out a throaty purr as her nipples drag across the floor. It seems she’s fired up enough to take pleasure in anything. With that in mind, I can’t resist playing with her a bit.

Her thick thighs are my first target. She purrs louder as my fingers sink into them, and her vulva twitches noticeably. So far so good. My hands make their way up to the cheeks of her rounded rump. Veri coos audibly when I start kneading her pillowey behind, marveling at the softness a lifetime on Easy Street has imparted on her body. She squirms, trying to get me to thrust into her again. I keep one hand on her rear to steady her, the other I use to grip her tail. I slide my hand up to the tip, savoring the touch of her glossy fur, though clearly not as much as Veri, who flinches in surprise and then falls limp as her tail glides through my hand. Looks like I’ve found her weak spot.

Satisfied that I’ve found the perfect way to draw this out and feeling a little needy myself after all this foreplay, I return my focus to the pulsing erection I still have planted inside the shivering housecat before me. I slowly ease out of her, relishing the way her ridged sex fights to keep me in, then drive back in as quickly as I can. I give her tail a firm stroke at the same time. Veri gasps and a fresh wash of her fluids dribbles down my sack. I pull out again, slam myself home, and give her tail another stroke. She arches her back, crushing her breasts against the ground.

Out, in, stroke. Out, in, stroke. Over and over as sweat beads on both our bodies. Veri is panting heavily now, and that weighty tension in the bottom of my belly is back with a vengeance. Though she’s been rendered almost insensate by our slow sexual waltz, she’s managing to put a little strength back into her legs now. With every thrust, she straightens them out a little more, raising her bum higher and higher into the air, eager to meet my every touch. Her enthusiasm is rather flattering, but before long I’m awkwardly hunched over her, my hips even higher up than hers in as I struggle to stay inside her and my face nestled between her twitching ears. I’m closing in on my climax, but Veri seems to be struggling to achieve release. Ragged breathing, apparent loss of muscle control, it’s like she’s trapped on the cusp of mind-reeling orgasm and can’t quite finish.

Something about her frustration and our feral position causes a long-forgotten memory to bubble up out of the sexual haze drowning my mind. Cat’s bite each other when they screw. For some reason. Seems kind of mean to me. Whatever.

I get my face out from between Veri’s twitching ears and give her a little peck on the nape of her neck. Her pussy clamps down so tight at the sensation that it threatens to push me out. Emboldened, I part my lips and give her a little love bite. That seals the deal for her. She gets even tighter, so tight that I can feel the frantic thudding of her heartbeat through my shaft as she cums. The overwhelming tightness is just enough to finish me off. I feel my urethra distending as a white-hot load begins an agonizingly long journey from my clenched sack into Veri’s sopping depths. To say that her own orgasm is wet would be an understatement. She gushes out enough that it starts to run down her up-tilted belly toward her breasts. It’s almost reached her breasts by the time I’ve finished pumping my seed into her. I’ve lost track of how many ropes I put into her, but I swear to god I feel lighter now.

“Mrrrrooooooowww…”

Veri lets out a contented meow and lies beneath me, cheek resting on the floor and cunt thrust up as high as she could get it for some time before she starts to regain her senses. I free myself from her snatch and take a seat on the floor as she gingerly lowers her hips back to the ground, too spent to even think about trying to stand up. Veri starts to groom herself, doing her best to straighten her sweat-matted hair, then turns her attention to me. I watch with interest as she crawls over to me and delicately dips her head between my legs. She pokes her prickly tongue out and begins diligently cleaning herself off of me. I pat her head idly as she works, a little embarrassed at the extra service I’m getting.

Then it hits me: I just shagged a cat. Maybe I’m a pervert?

Veri stretches out across my lap, arms over her head. She tilts her head back, exposing her neck in a display of affectionate submission, eyeing me expectantly. I put the TV guide to the side and scratch delicately under her chin, then move down to her tummy. She purrs loud enough to drown out the commercials and squirms beneath my hand, her tail curling and flicking acrobatically.

“Don’t spoil her too much honey, she sticks to you like glue as it is.”

Aunt Mary smirks as she watches Veri clap her paws down on my hand, holding it against her belly. I decide not to tell her that it’s far too late for that.

“Meew…”

A meek yawn reaches my ears from the box in the corner where Veri’s kittens are napping. The biggest of the litter flops over the edge of the box and rises shakily to her foot-paws. She manages to make it all the way over to us under her own strength, whereupon she wedges herself on top of me next to her mother.

“We may need to come up with a name for this one, I don’t see trying to separate her from you going very well.”

The kitten nuzzles against me with an enthusiasm on par with Veri’s, urging me to pet her. I oblige, taking the opportunity to look her over once again. Her delicate fur looks just like her mother’s, but…

“Huh. You know, her eyes look just like yours.”

They do. Her feline eyes are the exact same color as mine.

“Why you could swear she was your daughter.”

I chuckle along with Aunt Mary, hoping she has no idea how spot-on she is.

“Yeah. Imagine that.”

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