I awoke to every man’s dream. A beautiful woman whom I loved on each side of me. They were both sleeping soundly, still tired from the previous night. It was weird, I should be the most exhausted seeing as how I was doing most of the work, yet I felt great. I was an early riser anyway and best not to look a gift horse in the mouth, I decided to get up and cook some breakfast.
Carefully wiggling out of their combined embraces, I threw on my pants and made my way to the smaller stone chamber that served as a kitchen. I set about gathering my needed materials- a bowl, spoon, flour, baking powder, salt and sugar. Reaching into the fridge I also grabbed out some milk, eggs and butter.
What’s that you say? Donnie, lay off the drugs cuz you didn’t have a fridge there?
Yes I did.
It was one of my proudest engineering achievements as well as being the first collaboration with Victoria.
Folks around here have never heard of refrigeration and how it can preserve food, so when I told Victoria of it, she was naturally very interested in the process. After all, she didn’t go out too much so having food, especially fresh food, last longer was a very attractive prospect to her.
Creating a boxed frame out of iron and insulating it with the foam from my car seats, we used it as a solid base to start with. Then using the weather seals from the cars door, we lined the attached iron door making it air tight. For the heart of the thing, Victoria put a small chunk of blessed ice from a Mamono called an Ice Queen. It would never melt, no matter how hot it got. Using the steam from the hot spring to power it, we created a gear system hooked up a fan that would circulate the cold air throughout the box. The end result? This planets very first refrigerator.
Not exactly a Maytag, I know, but hey it did the job well enough.
Now some of you may think it’s a tad bit rude, going into someone’s kitchen, rifling through their cabinets and starting to cook but keep in mind I used to live here as well… Plus I just had sex with that particular someone and she plans on having my baby so I think I get a pass.
While humming the new Ed Sheeran song- Thinking Out Loud, I cheerfully threw some wood in a chamber under the large cast iron sheet that served as a cooking surface and lit it. Waiting for the skillet to heat up, I slathered it with some oil then went back and raided Victoria’s fridge again, this time taking out some sausages to serve as a side dish.
“I am capable of cooking for myself,” Victoria said grumpily as she came into the kitchen and sat down at its stone top table. She was never a morning person which was probably why she was only wearing my shirt and her leather thong panties.
“Oh really?” I asked, turning to her as I mixed batter in a bowl, “Then I guess you don’t want some of my world-famous pancakes?”
She immediately stopped talking after I asked her that but kept an extremely sour expression on her face.
”What’s pancakes?” Romie inquired as she popped outta no where and took a seat next to Victoria. She was wearing another shirt of mine… and nothing else. Jesus what did they do, get into my laundry?
“Yes, what is a pancake, Vic?” I retorted with a bit of sarcasm as I threw in a tad bit more honey into the mix. She liked them sweet.
Romie looked questionably over to her as Victoria’s sour expression grew more and more until she finally outbursted,
“They are the most delicious things in the world! I have craved for them ever since you have left and now you taunt me with their makings. You are truly a heartless, honorless, evil man!”
Yeah, like I said, not a morning person.
“So will that be one stack or two?” I asked sweetly.
“…Two,” She grumbled, looking down in embarrassment.
”Romie, you want some?”
My Cheshire looked to Victoria then back to me and gave a large toothy grin in answer.
Guess that’s a yes.
Pouring the batter into the now hot skillet, I went to working making my two ladies their breakfast. Soon the three of us each had a plate full of stacked high pancakes and greasy sausage, the breakfast of champions.
Mmm mmm! Damn I can cook! I thought to myself as I shoveled a fork full of pancake goodness slathered with honey into my mouth. The girls were doing the same as we all wolfed down our food. Everyone was quite hungry and I’m sure needed to replace a lot of calories after last nights marathon threesome sex.
“Still as good as you remember?” I asked teasingly to Victoria.
“ Uhmm hmm.” She replied, not bothering to waste precious moments on words when there were pancakes to eat. I was thinking she should slow down because she was getting a really flushed look on her face, but hey she’s a grown ass woman. She can do what she likes.
“How ya like them, Romie?”
“They’re really good,” She admitted, after swallowing another mouthful.
”But I prefer more… meat.” Taking her fork, she stabbed a sausage on her plate and began to sensually lick it before biting into it.
Cat… Carnivore… Meat… Sausage… Penis Innuendo….Her… Yeah made sense.
“Wait… what was it that you used as a topping?” Victoria suddenly asked looking at her empty plate as she started to grind her legs together.
“Uh honey, I think. I got it from the jar over there,” I said pointing to the now almost empty container on the counter.
“That’s not honey, that’s Alraune nectar! After all these years, you still haven’t mastered how to read?!” Victoria shouted/moaned at me.
Wait, what was an Alraune again? I asked myself, thinking back to the what’s-his-nuts-name encyclopedia of monster girls that I skimmed through all them years back. Those were the plant girls right? Didn’t they produce like a nectar that was sweet and made you horny?
Oh… Oh shit.
“I know how to read! …Kinda. Look it’s not my fault you guys have the most insane alphabet in the history of alphabets! I have trouble sometimes!” I shouted back defensively.
Letting lose another throaty, needy moan, Victoria turned to Romie who was watching her with great interest. To both our surprise, she grabbed my Cheshire by the face and kissed her deeply.
Well that was hot.
”I need sex… NOW!” Demanded Victoria with unusual authority. Standing, she tore off her soaked panties then grabbed Romie’s paw and my hand, dragging us to her bedroom.
Once we reached her bed, Victoria collapsed onto it, pulling Romie with her. Grabbing my Cheshire’s head, she practically rammed it into her crouch for her to lick.
Letting out a contented sigh as she felt my wife’s grainy tongue on her neither regions, Victoria turned her head to me and complained, “This is both your fault!”
“Okay, I’m sorry! What can I do to make it up to you?” I asked as I felt myself rapidly hardening from the scene in front of me.
“Come here and kiss me,” She moaned as she climaxed on Romie’s tongue, “Once this one is done, you’re going to take her place and neither of you will stop until the damn nectar’s effects wear off!”
“Not that I’m complaining but why are you blaming me?” Called Romie, her voice muffled between a pair of blue thighs.
Grabbing a handful of wavy black hair with purple stripes, Victoria growled cryptically at her, “Because you’re his wife,” As she roughly shoved Romie’s head back down to her pussy.
Maybe she was a little bitter?
We never did end up talking about Victoria’s parential decision. In the end it got washed up in… Well you know…
After that little… incident, it was an almost idealistic existence. I even managed to get my iPhone charged! Thanks to a little modification involving my old car battery and some steam works.
Everyday Victoria and I would examine and work on Big Boy while listening to music. She preferred the softer songs in my library. Making notes, and more tediously having to hand-make specific, unique tools to take him apart was a real pain in the ass. It took a few days just to make a screwdriver with a star head on it. Remember this thing wasn’t exactly thrown together from parts off a Home Depot shelf. Even the screws holding the panels on were special.
The only other thing that was the most difficult and perhaps amazing feat on Victoria’s part was the making of a replacement “key” that fit into its control mechanism. The assumption was that it would activate the nuke itself. If all else failed we had plans to detonate him in the farthest, deepest darkest part of the mountain. I prayed it didn’t have to come to that, the idea of setting off a nuclear bomb, even in controlled conditions, was terrifying.
That was during the day. Every night Victoria would come for her ‘payment.’ I thought that after a while Romie would start to actually get jealous, but she only fully encouraged it. During the day and at night she would fuel both of us on by whispering lewd things in our ears that would make a phone sex operator blush. After she was through, we would all be hornier then a bunch of teenagers. I almost feel that she was in her element and if she was having fun then I wouldn’t say anything, she deserved a little naughtiness.
Maybe I’m not that immune to magic as I thought I was or perhaps it was Romie’s influence on us but wildest and craziest thing that had happened was Victoria and I ended up doing it on her workbench.
Surprisingly it didn’t set her back and she declared that it actually helped her work. For a week straight after that I was fucking her from behind while she forged.
Crazy times but hey, it’s all for the cause, right?
Now let me make it clear, I wasn’t ignoring Romie. In fact she would very readily join in on all the action, then there would be moments where her and I would have some alone time in the bath or my room. I hesitate to say this because of how it would make me seem, that I was just content with sex, but it was one of the happiest moments of my life.
There were unhappy moments too…
”How is your supply of ammunition?” Victoria asked me one day as we slowly removed the top casing of Big Boy. I had an educated guess that we wouldn’t need any kind of suits or shielding at the exploratory stage and getting a good lay out would at least help us figure out where to go once we were ready.
“I need a couple cases of Silver rounds… and 15 regular bullets.” I mumbled, sketching on a piece of stone with some chalk what I saw.
“Oh Donnie…” Her tone was that of sadness and disappointment. I looked up to see it matched what was in her face and eye.
“I used Winona as sparingly as I could and when I did I used Silver rounds when it was possible, Vic. A couple of times… there were mistakes but they deserved it. They killed a family, were gonna kill a girl, I had to stop it. I won’t apologize for the lives I took, the worlds better off without em.” I said in a hardened voice.
She swallowed and slowly nodded at me, saying nothing. It was always a touchy subject between us. The use of real bullets vs. Demon Realm Silver ones, lethal vs. non lethal. She hated the idea of me taking a life no matter what the circumstances were. After that, we didn’t speak much to each other the whole day. When we did it was just short sentences, purely for work. Victoria never came for her payment that night.
It was a day of mixed emotions and feelings when a Hakutaku doctor visited Victoria to commission a new set of medical tools to use. One of the forms of payment was a medical exam. That day we found out she was pregnant. The girls hugged each other and cried in joy while I smiled on at the scene. A part deep inside me was apprehensive but what was done was done. No going back now. That night we all celebrated and quite possibly had some crazy insane sex. I can’t quite remember because I got really, REALLY drunk…
As the old saying goes though; all good things however must eventually come to an end.
I remember it like it was yesterday. I was walking back to the workshop from using the restroom when an explosion rocked the mountain. Rocky debris rained down, almost burying me. I was petrified that I would die, buried alive from a cave in. Thankfully the tunnel held but I knew the blast was no coincidence, GI Jane found us.
Pulling myself out of the rubble, I ran to my room. I grabbed Winona and tucked her between my backside belt as I made a mad dash back to Victoria’s workshop. When I arrived, I found I was too late.
A woman and 3 men flanked Romie and Victoria. All of them were covered with symbol laden heavy armor. The men all had their swords drawn and aimed at the girls while the woman seemed entirely too relaxed. The most disturbing, though, was one of the men wasn’t actually a man- more like a kid. He looked to be 14 at the most and had a faint glow about him.
”Ah so we finally meet,” The woman said cheerfully to me. She was in her late 30’s maybe early 40’s with strawberry blonde hair tied in a ponytail. Looking down at her hip I saw a holstered pistol. This was Colonel Faith…
“Don’t be shy, come closer. You must be Donnie, as you probably know, I’m Colonel Faith. It took me quite a while to dig through The Order’s paperwork on what they considered ‘strange individuals’. It took even longer to find Fredrickson’s report on you and what your actual name was. What I wouldn’t give for a good Windows PC around here, eh?”
I honestly didn’t know how to respond. She was talking to me like an old friend not like we had been in a life or death struggle over the past month or so . I slowly walked over to the girls. They seemed frozen, no their bodies were shivering slightly. What the hell was wrong with them?
“Where you from?” She asked me.
“No kidding? I have a brother there. Which part?”
”What did you do to them?” I asked, ignoring her question.
“The monsters? Well that’s the work of my boy, Adam here.” She said proudly as she walked over to the kid that was smiling evilly while concentrating on Romie and Victoria.
Running a hand over his cheek and chin, Faith caressed him fondly. She pecked him on the cheek as he blushed slightly then said,
“He’s very special. Not only is he one of the handful of surviving Hero trainees that escaped from the fall Lescatie, he also projects an Anti-Magic field that evidently interferes with the monsters nerves. With him around, killing them is so much more easier.”
She looked to me with an almost sad smile, “And now here we are. You and me, both from Earth, small world huh? The rest of my men want to kill you but despite everything you’ve done, I can’t bring myself to ok that. You’re the only one here that can actually understand me when I talk about computers or movies or how the Raiders suck every season. Maybe my sentimentality’s getting the better of me or I’m just missing home a little.”
As much as I hated this woman, all the pain and torment she’s brought me, a small piece sympathized with what she was feeling. I had to push that weakness away. She didn’t know I was armed. To her I was just a civilian plus the girls were in front of me were blocking most of the view . All of this could go south real quick and I couldn’t take that chance with Romie and Victoria in front of me. I had to wait for just the right opportunity.
She stared at the girls in front of me, then to me. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what our relationship was.
“It must be terrifying to be in love with one of them. To willingly open yourself up to be brainwashed, to be changed like they are. To place your care in another individual only to be used for nothing but body fluids. It’s the very definition of madness. And yet their kind spread it, desire it… live for it, like a plague. It’s a sickness, one that can only be remedied by death.”
“So what, Jane Seymour, you’re fancying yourself as a fucked up Dr. Quinn now?” I retorted, stalling for time to figure out a plan.
Faith smiled at me as she walked over to the workbench and laid her hand on Big Boy, trailing his length.
“No Donnie, but I do see this weapon as a cure for what is going on in this world. You have to see it as well. Humans here becoming less and less abundant while they grow more and more in number. Humanity’s time is running out and if we don’t do something then there will be no Human race left.”
Her words echoed frighteningly close to my own as she said them. It was an undeniable truth that I had been preaching myself.
“So what’s your goal then? I thought you were going to use Big Boy here as some kind of leverage.” I said quietly.
She looked me straight in the eye as she said, “I was but then a piece of new information surfaced that’s changed everything. Now I’m going to use the weapon to kill the Demon Lord herself.”
A dead silence enveloped the cavern, then in true form to myself, I busted up laughing. Everyone in the room turned to stare at me.
“Fucking serious? That’s your whole ‘evil’ scheme? What the fuck good is that going to do? There’s like a million of her daughters, the Lilim, to take her place.”
“Perhaps but very recently, monks here have unearthed evidence that sparked an interesting theory involving the Demon Lord. Ancient scrolls and texts delving thousands of years into this planets history, chronicling the cycle of the Demon Lords and the monsters themselves. It is now believed that if she dies, the monsters will revert back to what they originally were. Blood thirsty beasts.”
I looked to both Romie and Victoria, not believing any of this bullshit, but were both still petrified with whatever that kid Adam was doing. Maybe… maybe it wasn’t bullshit after all? No, that makes no sense-
“They don’t play fair do they?” She asked suddenly, gesturing to Romie and Victoria.
I looked to her, questionably.
“They’re so beautiful, so alluring. Makes killing them difficult in every circumstance. Each brings the promise of pleasure and false love, the cost is just that of your humanity and of your soul. For every Human lost, their number grows. When the Demon Lord did what she did and changed them, she fought dirty. She made the war unwinnable to anyone but her own. Just remember Donnie, it’s only because of her that your… partners next to you don’t tear you limb from limb and eat your corpse. Deep down they are all savage monsters and I’m going to show the world the truth. That without some whore Succubus in the lead, they are all just mindless beasts that need to be destroyed.”
Anger enveloped me as I grabbed on to both Romie’s paw and Victoria’s hand, squeezing hard. They each were somehow able to squeeze back. She was wrong, they weren’t monsters. They were the kindest, most wonderful women I have ever met. This fucking bitch was the real monster and her looney plans too.
In Victoria’s hand, I felt something small, metallic. She pressed it into my palm as I finally figured out what it was.
It was the key to Big Boy…
“Then that’s even more stupid.” I said back to her, “If that were true, you would be plunging this world into a blood bath! Millions would die! You’re not saving anyone!”
“Not true Donnie, with my help, maybe even our help, we could change that. Once the Demon Lord is dead, the monsters will lose their little sex appeal advantage. Their numbers will stop growing and finally, we will have an equal playing field. Then we arm the Humans here with modern-day tools, weapons and knowledge from Earth. It wouldn’t be as bad as you think, in about 5 years I’d say we would be victorious. Hunting them down to the last beast and the Human race here will finally be safe! Yes, lives will be lost but in the big picture, in the long game, Humanity survives!”
Geneocide or extinction… In the end that’s always what it came down to. Us or them. Humans or Mamono, no middle ground. Everyone in this fucking world dealt with absolutes, including this cunt. If I had my way, I would take Romie and Victoria off this planet and let it burn, let everyone here have their just deserts. But that wasn’t an option for me.
Looking into Faiths eyes, I made a decision. This was going to go one of two ways. Her and her goons die or Romie, Victoria, the baby and myself die. Knowing them, both the girls would put themselves in harm’s way for me to live. I couldn’t have that. They might not be my own species, but they treated me with more love, respect and kindness in this world they any Human ever did.
If this was the moment that I had to choose a side between the Humans or the Mamono of this world, well then, let me offer my answer.
Pulling Winona out from behind me, I quickly aimed and fired a round straight into Adam’s head. Even though she was loaded with Silver rounds, the result was the same as if they were normal. The anti-magic field he radiated made them just as real, just as lethal. He fell to the ground, dead. With him gone, it instantly dissipated.
God, if you are out there, if I’m wrong about everything, please, please have mercy on me for doing it. I didn’t want to but I had to, I had to save them and in doing so, I killed a kid that would have been barely in high school. I turned Winona on Faith as Romie and Victoria snapped out of whatever haze they were in. Romie jumped into action, attacking the other two soldiers while Victoria started to hyperventilate and backtracked away from the body.
I was a bit too slow, because Faith drew her own pistol on me as we faced off to each other.
“He was just a kid!” She shouted at me, her face twisted with grief and rage.
“You didn’t give me a fucking choice! YOU brought him here, YOU started this shit, this is on YOU!” I yelled back with tears in my eyes. I didn’t want to do it! Lord help me, I didn’t!
The room became quite as my Cheshire succeeded in subduing the soldiers while neither Faith and I dared move or look away from each other. It was a game of Chicken except whoever blinked would die.’
“It’s over.” I said to her, my hands gripping Winona so tightly that my knuckles were turning white.
“You’re wrong on that you fucking bastard. I have more men outside. When I don’t come back out, they will flood this place then you all will die.” She sneered back at me.
“I didn’t think you had a gun. That piece of shit looks like it hardly works. Besides I could kill you and your whores before you could even pull the trigger.”
“Winona here was made by the best blacksmith in the fucking world, so don’t count on it. Plus I have perfect scores on all the Time Crisis games, don’t go thinking you’re the only sure shot here, bitch.” I retorted back insanely.
A commotion of screaming and yelling from the halls told me Faith wasn’t lying this time. I didn’t know if Romie was gonna change to her alter ego and even if so, how many Red Romie could handle by herself without being overran. I just felt a cold numbness inside me. Maybe this really was the end.
“Oy! Now ain’t this a sight, ey Zoe?” Came a feminine voice with an Australian-like accent.
Wait, what the fuck?
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw two Red Oni in ornate silver armor with giant gold clubs hung over their shoulders entering the cavern.
Who the hell are they?
Breaking our eye contact with each other, Faith turned her head to them and shouted,
”Where the fuck are my men?!”
”They our men now, Shelia.” One of them said with a menacing grin.
With Faith distracted by the Red Oni’s, I squeezed Winona’s trigger. The thunder of gunpowder exploding, a splash of red. There was shouting, screaming, I couldn’t tell you from who or where. All I saw is her body falling before me in slow motion, lifeless before it hit the ground. There was blood on the floor, a lot of it. Someone or something slammed into me, Winona fell from my fingers or maybe she was taken away, I’m not too sure…
I just know that I killed another person that day.
Think what you will of me at this point. I won’t stop you or defend myself. So far I’ve confessed a… chilling amount of murders including that of a kid and a member of the Armed Forces. I won’t discuss with you circumstances or argue deservement. I’m more of a monster then Colonel Faith, then any Mamono… or anything. Please… forgive me if I’m not making much sense right now. I don’t know who’s reading this or if anyone out there is, but if someone is… I just want to say… to tell you I’m sorry… I really am. I’ve commited horrible sins, more than maybe you’ll ever believe of me capable of.
I want to stop right now. I want to walk away from writing this, but I can’t. You deserve to know, you need to know the truth. I need to tell you what happened after because… because it changes everything…
I don’t remember much from there, just someone pushing me. But what I do remember is the look in Victoria’s eye as our gazes met. I killed two people in front of her, in her very home. I’ll never forget the look on her face… I lost her that day.
We rode in some kind of carriage. I was out of it for a time. Romie told me that I didn’t eat, I barely drank. I wouldn’t respond to her. I just stared at the floor. The only explanation was maybe I shut down. Shell shocked or traumatized by what I did, my mind needed to heal or at least come to terms with what happened.
I ended up snapping out of it a few days later. I remember fully becoming aware as I found myself in Romies arms. She was asleep as the carriage swayed and rocked, soft yellow light filtered through the doors windows. A crushing feeling of hopelessness, depression and despair filled me. What did I do? What was I even doing? What’s the point of saving the world if you end up killing the people in it?
Romie stirred slightly and tightened her hold on me. For some reason I felt a little better as she did. I told myself that as long as I had her, everything would be ok. She was my everything now..
I learned that the Mamono who grabbed us were members of the elite Royal Guard to the Maou herself. Don’t ask me how they found us, maybe they were following Faith and her guys, who knows. They were taking us to the Royal Maki, home of the Maou for an audience with her. I also learned that they had Rudolf, Winona and Big Boy as well. I suppose it made it a fucked up family road trip.
It took another 4 or 5 days to reach the Maou’s realm and her castle. By that time, I was nearly back to my old self, but I knew there was a piece missing. I lost Victoria and all hope of having some kind of relationship with her and the baby. I couldn’t afford anymore time to grieve, to show weakness. So I did what I had to do to stay sane, I buried it deep inside myself. A way of filling the hole in my soul. Just another day on the job, right?
We were ushered to the throne room without delay when we arrived at the castle. Romie was allowed few moments to dawn her crystal crown tiara before we were brought to stand before the raised platform of the throne that the Maou sat on. A tall, beefy football player looking guy dressed in black, nobleman’s clothes, her husband I guessed, stood by her side as they glanced down upon us.
“Please come forward and state your full name and lineage for everyone in the room.” The Maou requested.
Romie swallowed hard and took my hand in her paw as we both took a step forward. Taking breath, she said loudly,
“I am Princess Romilia Smith de’ Cor’Meum. Daughter to the Queen of Hearts, Misrelda de’ Cor’dibus and the Human, Eric Smith… of the place called Earth.”
There were various gasps and whispers among all the Mamono courtiers there. I was surprised to see the Maous husband wearing a slightly shocked expression as he looked to his wife then back to Romie. I was stunned as well, I had never heard Romie’s full name before, it definitely sounded very royal. Not for the first time I wondered to myself why she was hanging out with a bum like me.
Romie turned her head to me and offered a large, mischievous grin that was somehow comforting right up until she called out again,
”Let it also be known that the man next to me is Donnie, also of Earth. Prince and Hero to Wonderland as well as my husband and my love.”
Everyone in the room, including the Maou and her husband, turned their eyes to me. Uh, well surprise, surprise, grandma and grandpa?
Gee, thanks Romie…
But I also cursed myself too for not remembering to ask her about the whole ‘Prince’ thing too, so yeah my bad. I was a bit worried when old grandpa fixed me with a pissy stare and even more worried when grandma Maou gave me a predatory smile. Dinner was certainly going to be awkward.
“We recognize and welcome you, daughter of my daughter,” The Maou said, smiling warmly at Romie. Guess it was a little too taboo to just call her granddaughter. Then, turning her head to me she said,
“We also welcome you, Traveler and bid you both to enjoy our hospitality.
Now your favorite gun slinger here might be an idiot but I wasn’t born yesterday. There were a lot of connotations in that short sentence she just said.
The first being she never formally recognized me as Romie’s husband – my spidey sense was telling me that was some bad news. The second, she said hospitality so even though we were brought in by her elite guards, we technically weren’t prisoners- yet. The third was perhaps the most interesting to me. She called me a Traveler – there was a capitol T in there folks. Something very important was in that meaning and I badly wanted to find out.
“Now then, with introductions out of the way, you have in your possession something I badly want, I badly need… Donnie.” She said, looking over to me.
Well, it’s always nice to be needed. But not by her.
”If it’s the cheat codes to Donkey Kong, I’m taking those to my grave.”
The Maou gave me a blank look that then turned salty as Romie bumped me with the side of her hip. From the corner of my vision, I saw a smirk on her face and glint in her eye. Yeah, that just turned her on.
“The activation of the device.”
What the fuck? Did like Mark Zuckerburg put it out that I had a nuke? Cuz for what’s suppose to be a secret, every god damn person seems know about it.
Maybe something inside me snapped a little. I used to be terrified of the thought of meeting the Maou. I always saw her as a parasite on this world. Now, I was just tired, angry, frustrated and that kids death was still fresh on my mind. All because that of that damned thing. Now this one wants it for god knows what…
”Why?” I asked simply, defiantly.
“Why? Because you were correct when you once uttered a very true statement. I can’t solve the problem of Mamono birthing male child. That avenue was forever closed to me by The Chief God, herself when I made the Great Change. I sought an end to an endless war. No more slaughtering, no more battles, no more bloodshed, just peace and love. A mixing of our two kinds as one, where we would live happily ever after. But that didn’t work out quite the way I was hoping for.” The Great Maou said softly, her eyes gazing distantly off. Then she snapped her attention back to me.
“Your world is different isn’t it, though? Your kind embraced technology over magic and that is where the key to Mamono survival lies.” She said intently to me, “I want to use the weapon to open a permanent gateway between our two worlds. Your scientists and geneticists hold the key for Mamono to birth human male children.”
Mamono aren’t on Earth…. They will be…. Came the faint whispers of a forgotten dream in my ear.
I started to laugh. At first just a chuckle, then to a point where it was almost hysterical. Everyone in the chamber was staring at me as I fought a battle to compose myself.
”This… this isn’t funny to anyone else but me huh?” I finally asked looking around, meeting angry, stony stares from everyone but Romie.
“No… I guess I would be the only one to think so.”
“You doubt that I would be adept at diplomacy and negotiating with your leaders?”
”The whole rape first, ask questions later bit calls that into question, yeah. Sure that might work here, but not over there. Look, doesn’t the fact that there is such a thing as a nuke spark any kind of warning signs? I asked, looking around at everyone. No one met my eyes.
“So what, you think you’re just going to go take a merry old stroll across the dimensional street? Knock on Earth’s door, maybe holding a fresh-baked apple pie in your hands and say ‘Hi neighbor, was wondering if you could help me with a small problem?’ Is that it?” I said, fighting to keep the laughter down as the insanity of the moment unfolded. Then my face hardened at the thought as I continued.
“My people don’t even like each other. We discriminate and hate and kill because of religion, of nationality, of gender, of the color of a person’s GOD DAMN SKIN! “ I shouted, causing the guards to stir even more. Romie tried to comfort me, to calm me, but I wouldn’t have it. If the Maou wanted to follow through on this insanity then she would have to learn exactly how fucked up my kind of Humans were.
”You will start a war you cannot hope to win, Maou. Your people will DIE when missiles and bombs and bullets hit them, your Superman of a husband over there will DIE when he gets pumped full of depleted uranium rounds by Special Forces, you will DIE when a god damn nuke, bigger then the one I have, blows this whole place to hell. There is no scenario where we all end-up sitting around a fire singing kumbaya, Maou.”
“Are you quite done with your dramatics?” She asked in a bored tone, “I’m a quite a few years older than you, young man. You’re going to have to trust me that things will not come to that.”
“Trust you? You basically admitted that you and the Chief Holy whats-her-tits fucked this world over and now you want me to trust you to take a ride over to my side of the yard to get help? Someone, please tell me why is it that every single voice in my head is screaming no?” I laughed bitterly.
“Your psychological conditions are not my problem.” She said angrily.
“You’re right, their not. But the fact that I have the key to Big Boy is.” I retorted back at her. In the end I had my ace. If she wanted this, she had to go through me to do it.
“If you want to use him, you’re gonna need it.” I snarled menacingly.
“My patience with you is wearing thin, child. Give the key to me.” She growled, her eyes turning red. I could feel pressure building inside the room but I was too damn riled up to care.
”Well, that makes two of us, Grandma. The answer is still no- Earths closed. I am not going to endanger my home planet to fix your fuck up.”
The feeling of the place took a whole nother turn as I heard various gasps and saw Romie cover her mouth with both paws in shock at what I said.
…Yeah, I fucked up, didn’t I? In retrospect, and I fully admit, calling the Demon Lord ‘Grandma’ to her face wasn’t exactly the smartest thing in the world to do… Then, on top of that, rubbing in her greatest screw up… Yeah…
Me and my big mouth, I thought as 2 burly Red Oni guards dragged me away.
“Well… this is a revoltin’ development,” I said aloud to myself as I grabbed on to the bars of my jail cell. Had Winona, my horse and my nuclear bomb confiscated, aaaannnd now I’m singing the jailhouse blues. Plus the Ogre guard over yonder was eye raping me something serious. Remember lady, no means no- even when you think it means yes. Thanks Nivena, for that little insight on consent.
But hey things could be worse, right? I’m not exactly sure how things could be worse, but I’m pretty sure they could be worse. Maybe something with an Ushi Oni or… something…
My musings were interrupted by the sound of someone praying in the next cell. Looking over, I saw a guy on his knees facing the wall, praying feverishly to himself. I was impressed, the Royal Maki was the biggest and baddest Demon Realm out there and pretty much any Human (except yours truly) that spent more than a few hours here gets turned into an Incubus. Billy Gram over there must be a pretty tough bastard.
“Yo, what are you in for?” I called to him. He paused in his praying and looked over to me. The guy looked to be in his mid 40s with streaks of grey in his jet black hair. He had a fair amount of wrinkles around his eyes and mouth giving me the impression that he’d seen some shit.
”Heeding the true word of the Chief God and smiting the abominations that spit on her teachings.” He said sternly to me.
Yep, he was an Inquisitior alright. I seem to be running into more of them than drunks at a bar. Wonder if it’s the ‘I’ve been banging a member of Mamono royalty’ cologne that I’ve been putting on as of late.
“What of you, boy? Why haven’t you been swallowed up by these demons?” He asked.
Heh, well guy, there was some swallowing involved…
“Eh… I kinda fucked up. Called the Maou a grandma to her face, refused to give her the key to an ultimate weapon and I think I may have told her that the Feng Shui of her throne room was off.” I said nonchalantly.
He stared at me for a moment, probably trying to figure out if I was A: Lying, B: Crazy or C: All the above. Finally he said,
“Get on your knees and pray for your soul, child. The Chief God will have mercy on you if you join me in prayer.”
“Yeah, no. I’m good, thanks.” I said as I started to pace around in my cell while El Inquisitior snorted and went back to praying.
Looking around, all in all, the place wasn’t exactly your run of the mill prison cell. For one it was clean with stone floors, in the corner was a cot made up with a pillow and blanket. Next to it was a small table with a vase and flowers. It was all kinda… nice? For a prison cell that is. Guess that’s what happens when you have women make the jails.
My musings were interrupted when the Maou herself paid me a visit. She wasn’t alone however, a slightly shorter, cloaked woman was in tow behind her. She had the hood pulled deeply up over her head obscuring her face.
Walking behind the woman, the Maou placed her hands on her shoulders and whispered something in her ear.
The woman nodded as she stared at me, then after a moment said in a monotone voice,
”Deep scan completed, analysis will take 4 hours, 53 minutes.”
“Good, now continue on with the rest of your tasks, Jenny.”
She… Jenny wordlessly walked away as I gave a questioning look to the Maou and said,
”What the hell was that a-“
”MOTHER OF DEMONS! THE CHIEF GOD WILL SMITE YOU DOWN ONE DAY!” Yelled the Inquisitior next door. Turning to him I saw the look of pure unbridled rage as he all but foamed at the mouth. Spouting some shit off to the Maou, herself… Son of a bitch had balls, I’d give him that.
The Maou casually pointed a finger at him without saying a single word.
The Inquisitior started to choke and heave. Collapsing on the floor, he violently convulsed as his body rapidly started to shift and change. I could hear bones creaking, breaking and shifting. His skin tearing and crackling, turning brown and bumpy. After a terrifying few moments a newly born Incubus laid gasping on the ground.
“Was that really necessary?” I mumbled, sickened by process.
“Shall I tell you how many he and his men slaughtered in his crusade? Or how many he orphaned? That’s when he was feeling generous enough to let the children live, mind you.”
I shut my mouth and peered over to the now raving incubus in the cell next to me. I fought hard against the flashbacks of the Raiju girl, killing those pricks back at her cottage and of burying her parents. Well I guess karma was a bitch like that… or Demon Lord in this instance. She signaled to the Ogre guard and he was taken away to god knows where. His manic screams and yells echoed throughout the corridor walls until a heavy door slammed shut, bringing silence once again.
“Now then, before we were so rudely interrupted, how are you, Donnie?”
“Just peachy, Emperor Palpatine, although I think I would prefer a suite at the Hilton.” I sighed tiredly looking down at the grey stone floor while gripping the bars. It was a long fucking day.
”I hear the Marriot is better. Free Wi-Fi and friendlier service.”
…What the hell?
I froze when she said that. Slowing raising my head to look up at her, I couldn’t keep my eyes from bulging out of my head as I took a few steps back from the bars. How the hell… There was no way. No possible way…
“Emperor Palpatine… that’s from a movie, correct? Hmmm… Let me see if I remember… A dark lord of some sort? Not exactly complimentary, now is it Donnie? But then again compliments were never your forte, were they?”
She smiled evilly at my frightened silence.
“What’s wrong Donnie? No come back? No sarcastic, profanity laced quip?” She leaned in as close as she could to the bars. “Cat got your tongue? No that can’t be it, Romilia is having a heart to heart with my husband right now as we speak. She’s trying to convince him to let you go. That girl really does loves you.”
“Who are you?” I whispered.
Pulling her head back, she laughed at my question.
“Who am I? That’s a simple answer, Donnie, even for you. I’m a woman, a wife, a mother, a parent, a ruler of dozens of species that all desperately need a miracle to continue their survival. That’s who I am. And right now you are fucking that up.”
The Maou paused and placed her finger on her lower lip in thought. “Forgive the profanity, but I did use that phrase correctly, didn’t I? It’s such a versatile word, out of the many things you introduced to this world, I have to say that is certainly the most interesting.”
I continued to give her a flabbergasted stare. What the fuck?
“How… how do you know about…”
“Earth? Hotels? Movies?… Fucks?” She finished.
I swallowed and nodded, fearful of her answer.
“There’s a great many things I know Donnie. For example, like it or not, our two worlds are connected and will continue to be so. I also know that you have two options available to you right now. The first, and it’s the one hope you’ll choose, is you join me, join us. You, Romie, Misrelda, her sisters, my husband and of course myself, let us become a true family. Join us in our goal to not only spread peace and love but to help solve the greatest threat to all of Mamono existence. Be our Hero.” She said passionately to me.
“And what’s the second option? You kill me?” I asked quietly.
”What? No! How did you ever get that into your head? I would never do such a thing!” She exclaimed, seemingly appalled that I would suggest it.
I breathed a sigh of relief. Well that’s good, at least my life wasn’t in danger.
”I would just keep you locked up here for the rest of your natural life.”
God damn it.
“Look, I know you’re doing what you think is best but, please believe me when I say, it’s a really really bad idea.”
She smiled ruefully at my words, “Ironic, I was going to say the same to you.”
“You don’t know the Humans of my world. They’re just as bad as the ones here and they will not accept you or your kind.”
”Donnie, you have to trust me. Believe that I do care about you and the people of your world. You are the husband to my granddaughter and a part of my family now. I won’t let your fears come true.”
”Please…” She said implored softly.
Oh now she’s hitting me up with the whole La Familia bit. Cute. Next thing you know it’s gonna be barbecues and pool parties at her place, playin Marco Polo with all the Lilims. 50 bucks says one of them cheats and literally flies out of the pool. I snorted at the thought.
”You know, Maou, since I’ve been on this world, I’ve had to do some pretty fucked up things.” I began.
”I had to bury a little girls parents. Their only crime was being in love. I killed men because they fought for the survival for their race. Had to kill some kid Hero because he was at the wrong place at the wrong time, working for the wrong bitch. Then I had to subsequently kill her too.”
I bunched up my fists, the memories still fresh in my mind.
“And now here you are, asking me to make a decision that would affect countless billions of lives. Just one more fucked up thing to add to the list right? No man, no person should make that kind of decision. No one should have that kind of power.”
I stared up at the stone ceiling, as if the answer was magically written on it. The Maou said nothing as she listened to me. I avoided looking into her eyes, call it intuition, spidey sense or whatever, but something told me that if I did, I would get lost in them. From what I’ve known and been told, she was a being of almost infinite power, and yet here my dumb ass was, not only trying to match wits but defend my world, my species from her. The most ironic thing? It was vice versa, I was defending them too, little did they care.
”That kind of responsibility, that kind of power terrifies me. Give me some time to think about it?” I asked, stalling.
“If I may share with you something that only a few truly know?” She asked.
Da hell? Was this share your deepest darkest secrets day and no one told me?
I nodded slowly, not knowing what to expect.
“Before I became the Maou or Demon Lord as some call it, I was just an ordinary Succubus. My kind were different back then, we reveled in killing as much as we did in pleasure. I did many things that I was not proud of. Killed good people, good men for a Lord and Master that was the very definition of evil. And I did it against my will, over and over again, living an endless nightmare.”
I saw tears fall from her eyes. I briefly wondered if they were of the crocodile variety as she continued,
“There were others that felt the same way I did. So when he died, with their help, I became Maou and I did what I had to do that, yes, would affect millions maybe even billions, but to save lives. Lives on both sides, Donnie. You have no idea what it was like before I enacted the Great Change. Humans were nothing but a food source to us, a quick meal and something to play with before brutally killing. Men, women, children, there was no difference to us. I made a decision to save both races the best way, the only way I could.”
Even my dumbass could feel the weight of history behind her words. She changed this world, changed its course. Now she wanted to change mine as well.
“In the end, to save the species of countless Mamono, what will your choice be? Ultimately, our fate is in your hands, Donnie. But of course, take all the time you need. I don’t think either of us are going anywhere.” She said sniffling, smiling sweetly before walking away.
Yeah… No pressure or anything…
An hour or so later, Romie popped into my cell.
”Hey.” She said softly.
“Hey,” I replied as I moved over on the cot as much as I could to make room for her.
Taking the hint, she walked over and laid down next to me. I took her in my arms and hugged her tightly, burying my face in her curly dark hair. As dumb as it sounds, the smell of her comforted me. Even if the whole world was going to hell, as long as I had her in my arms, I knew I would be ok.
Yeah I know, I was being a pussy but I’ll always say, she was the best damn thing that ever happened to me.
“I tried talking to grandfather…” She began.
”It’s okay. I already know.”
“I’ll get you out of here, I promise! Even… Even if I have to break you out! I’ll ask my friend for help, she always helps us! We’ll run away from everything! Go somewhere far away, just us… far, far away!” She said erratically.
“Shhh, it’s okay, it’s okay,” I hushed, squeezing her tightly, but then curiosity got the better of me and I asked,
”Romie… who’s your friend?”
“Well, she’s my friend. You’ve met her before a bunch of times, she’s saved you from dying.” Romie explained as if I should know already, “She lives inside me.”
I felt my heart skip a beat and not in a good way. She was talking about Red Romie. She knew… She always knew about her…
Working up enough saliva in my dry mouth, I finally said, “M-maybe we’ll just hold off on asking her for help until we really need it ok?”
“If you say so,” She mumbled into my chest.
I didn’t want to imagine Red Romie going on a rampage in the Royal Maki. The destruction, the death… I’ve had enough of that to last me a lifetime.
“I know what I have to do and I hate it because I’m not given a very good choice with billions of lives on the line. I just wished there was another way.” I sighed.
“What are you going to do?” She whispered.
”I’ll need some time, negotiate my terms to her, then I’ll give her the key to the damn bomb. Let her have what she wants. And as soon as that damn gateway or whatever opens up, you and I are going through it. I’m done with this bullshit. I’m taking you home with me. You’ll meet my folks, I’ll show you around my hometown, introduce you to all the cool stuff we talked about. Maybe somehow get a little place in the country, just you and me,” I whispered back to her.
Romie pulled away and looked at me, her eyes shining with tears and a large smile on her face.
“You mean it?”
“With all my heart… My wife.”
As soon as I said that, she kissed me passionately.
“You’re going to give me 10- no 20 kittens! We’ll have the biggest family in all of Conecut!” She exclaimed while slaughtering the good states name and kissing me again.
“How about just one at a time and see how it goes?” I asked hopefully.
“Hmmm… Okay, but just remember, you can’t say no to me when I want sex.” She reminded me seductively.
“Yes ma’am.” I replied with a grin.
”Like right now.”
”Seriously? The guard over there is totally peeping on us!” I pointed to the Ogre that was absently masturbating through her short metal skirt while watching our little scene.
“I’ll take the audience.” Romie said firmly as she pulled off my clothing.
“You know I never really took you for an exhibitionist!” I cried as she stoked and pumped me to hardness.
“Less talking, more sex.” She said as she mounted me.
Well, it’s one way to spend an evening in jail.
We spent the morning and the afternoon cuddling in each other’s arms. The food was pretty decent, I suppose it had to be because the simple fact that technically, we were royalty. Later on that evening I was ‘summoned’ for a private meeting with the Maou in her sitting room. A Kejourou dressed in an incredibly revealing back dress lead me to a large ornate wooden door. Her long, dark hair snaked it’s way up my pant leg and caressed my thigh until I slapped it away. She giggled at that and directed me to enter.
”Hello Donnie, please give me a moment to finish up.” The Maou greeted me as she sat at a table, rapidly writing in a large leather bound book.
“Everyone seemed shocked about Romie being a princess and a relative… except you.” I said randomly as I looked around the parlor. It was pretty much how you would expect it. Ancient books probably filled with mystical arcane knowledge, artifacts and trinkets displayed here and there that were more or less likely insanely powerful. You know… typical Demon Lord decor.
“Very observant. You’re correct in that statement, Misrelda kept her marriage and the birth of Romilia a secret from everyone in the family. She was always the odd one, preferring to play by herself as a child.” The Maou sighed as she stood and skimmed through the many tomes on a nearby shelf. Grabbing one off, she returned to the table and thumbed through the pages while saying,
“I invited her to a family reunion not too long ago. I wanted to give her a chance to reconnect, to debut her daughter to us. But unfortunately she never came and the whole thing became a debacle with most of my daughters fighting over a particular man. Children can be such a pain sometimes.”
”So how did you know?” I asked, curious.
“A mother always knows….” She replied enigmatically, reading a page with her index finger then peering up at me.
“Now then, back to business, there have been many Travelers that have come to this world over the ages. Some intentional, others quite unintentional,” She said while absently looking over to a weird chess board on a small table in the corner of the room.
“You though, you are quite the mystery. The girl that you met earlier was something called an Automaton. I’m sure you’ve heard of artificial life forms before. She did what was called a deep scan of you and came up with some rather fascinating findings.” She looked at me intently.
“You’re an anomaly, a sliver between two worlds, Donnie, somehow impossibly existing in both at the same time. For all intensive purposes, you should be quite dead, torn asunder by the dimensional, temporal and physical strain of being in both here and there. Yet here you stand in front of me, perfectly fine. Interesting wouldn’t you say?”
The Maou stared at me, expectantly. She was wanting a response- something deep, profound, scientific and yet nothing really came to mind. Maybe I was just overwhelmed by her realization or maybe I really didn’t have the educational background to ask or say the right things to her. So I settled for a tried and true statement that she couldn’t possibly argue against.
”Hey, shit happens,” I said with a shrug of my shoulders.
Throwing a hand over her face in frustration, the Maou took in and exhaled a deep breath.
”Well what the hell do you want me to say? I didn’t ask to come here! All I remember is I was coming home from work one day, some gran-… er, yeah, old lady must have ran the stop sign because she t-boned me and the next thing I know, my happy ass is here along with everything else! That’s my story. I don’t know how or why it happened but here I am a… Connecticut Yankee in the Great Maou’s court.” I practically yelled back in my own frustration.
Maou-ma took a moment to digest what I said to her before saying,
”Indeed. If what you say is true then it is something I will have to research as to why. You say your possessions also came here as well?”
“Interesting… Well, in the meantime it seems you’ve also managed to attract the attention of someone else in this world. Does the name Ilias sound familiar?”
“She that really slutty Kejourou that you sent to grab me?”
I actually did know who that was, but the suicidal part of me said, ‘Fuck it, let’s push all super powerful Demon Lords buttons before dinner and see what happens!’
“No, it’s the name of the genocidal Chief God that I’ve been in a power struggle with for centuries.” She growled in return, her eyes flaring red.
Okay, maybe not such a good idea…
“Oh. Nope can’t say I’ve met one of her before.”
“Think very, very hard. You’ve been in her presence. I can sense it, there’s a trace amount of her energy on you, almost too small to notice. She was extremely careful in covering up her meeting with you. Also she would have almost certainly appeared as a Human if that helps.” The Maou pressed, her eyes returning to normal.
Now that part was interesting. Queen B here thinks I’ve been rubbing elbows with a God… Goddess whatever. What a load of crap. I wanted to tell her she was smoking something but then I got to thinking…
Could it have been Faith? Nah, she was certainly no Goddess. Who then? It was then that I suddenly thought back to that weird dream I had months ago. The other side of the coin, isn’t that who she said she was? Human, blonde… Maybe…. maybe that was her, wasn’t it? I paled and touched my fingers to my lips as I remembered.
“Ara Ara! You do remember! What did she do to you? Something… inappropriate I take it?” The Maou asked leering a smile at me.
“I… I had a dream… I think we went out on a date? She… kissed me afterwards…” I said slowly.
The Maou erupted in laughter, startling me from my thoughts. I watched as she doubled over in mirth, wondering if I should be concerned that she thought it was hilarious that I was married to her granddaughter and yet somehow ended up going out with her arch nemesis.
”And that bitch calls me a slut!” She breathed though the laughter. “Here she is consorting with a married man then kissing him! Oh Donnie! I think you’ve just made my millennium! I’m so going to rub this in her face!”
The Maou laughed even harder after saying that, leaving me slightly pissed off. Seriously? This was what it all was to her? A piece of dirt to use against the Chief God, Sex in the City style?
Well now, Samantha would be proud…
I pressed my lips together to keep myself from saying anything that would have me ending up thrown back in the dungeon again. This really was some bullshit, though.
The Maou finally composed herself after a short while, then walked over to her desk and picked up a small silver bell. Ringing it twice, she looked over and fixed me with a creepy smile.
I frowned hard back at her. This was how horror movies started…
Shit, next thing you know Jason or Freddie Kruger is gonna pop out and kill me, I just know it.
A few moments later the doors swung open and a weirdly dressed guy walked through. He looked Human, was dressed in a white long sleeved top with a green skirt… no a kilt and leather boots up that reached almost up to his knees. He had long black hair braided in a ponytail and for some reason reminded me of the main character from an old Japanese Anime called Tenchi Muyo. The guy was regarding me with the same interest as I did him as we stared at each other from across the room.
What the hell was goin on here, who the fuck was this?
”Donnie, I would like to introduce you to a friend of mine,” She sweetly said with the same smile that made my skin crawl, “This is the Majin Annwyfyn Arawn. In my infinite generosity, I’ve decided to treat the two of you to an all expenses paid boys night out…”
Authors Note: Next chapter will be delayed as Moongrim and I figure out what the hell the next chapter actually is. Cheers!